i want to touch you / with my words

I want to touch you with my words…
Watch them skim across your skin.
Sigh as the shivers of your breath
Inhale and breathe them in.

There’s a need within my breast
Begging for sweet reprieve;
My words, they fall and filter through you
Like sunshine through the leaves.

I want to move you with the soft
Slow hymn of my heart.
In part, I want to please you
(or perhaps just to tease you…)
But in the end I want you satisfied,
By all the words you hold inside.

The words I place upon your palm
As my eyes, they whisper a silent psalm.
I want to woo you with my words
(watch them lay peaceful upon your smile)
Beguile you awhile with the cadence of my ways

I want to touch you with my words…
Until there’s nothing left to say.

Reviews

[Fran Marie]

I want to woo you with my words
(watch them lay peaceful upon your smile)
Beguile you awhile with the cadence of my ways

I want to touch you with my words�
Until there's nothing left to say.

a very well crafted and exquisitely penned piece of writing~ Love the ine
"Beguile you awhile with the cadence of my ways'~ Great writE!~Fran Marie

[Wildfleour]

A wonderful poem, Kara.

[An owl on the moon]

Absolutely amazing! So tender and deep, gently caressing the mind and heart. You write words that paint vivid pictures of life and love. No wonder you won GOLD!!!!

[J. Hampton]

Exquisite....in every way...

Like a sweet devotion spoken slightly under the breath
just...the right touch of playfulness...in both internal rhyme and tone
you...just draw the image of an engaging ..bashful...yet confidant encounter

My Vote ...hands down

kudos !!!!!!!!!!!

Blessssssssssssssssss

[LUX]

so beautiful... you are wondeful with words!

[Larisa Ann Howarth]

(*smiles*) I'm 'speechless' with this one! Fabulous...

'My words, they fall and filter through you
Like sunshine through the leaves...'

The imagery is breathtaking....and very clever....

love it!

[Robert Luna]

Your words surround me like a warm blanket. Very peaceful. Great job

[Roger F Aucoin]

Beautifully done. I bow to Jos Weiss' comments below. And you may wish to add a period at the end of stanza 4. Nice job, Pooh Bear!

[Jonathan Weiss]

I like the connection of the title to the poem. I find the poem itself very sweet, and the personification of "words" effective. Good alliteration, and both internal and external rhyme were used well.
Some things diminished the beauty for me.
S1 begins nicely, but the repetition of "inhale" and "breathe them in" detracts from the stanza.
(Of course it helps the rhyme, but maybe you could phrase the thought in a different way.)

In S2, removing "they fall and" tightens the meter...ask yourself if sunshine actually falls...

In S4 similarly, do you really need the word "they"?

I find the last couplet beautiful.

If you take this one back to the drawing board, I believe you can create a stellar poem, refining the solid nucleus you already have. Peace, Kara. Jon.

[Annelise]

Stunning, your use of words is amazing. waiting to get to the next stanza almost hurt. It's lovely.