a friendship filled with daisies

to jeanmarie, my fellow poet, and friend.

I think of you with the same fragrance
as saffron-tinted sunshine
and forgotten daisy dreams.

When breathing has lost its benefits
and my path has been covered
with petals

I think of you.

Recalling the way
our minds collide
(the gentle way) you confide
in me

How your voice becomes a breeze
as you delve -delicately-
into the sections of your soul

time has slowly
sutured
up.

yet as your ethereal eyes meet mine
you place these pieces to my palm
and I am allowed a glimpse at

your hidden beauty.

You are lovely; of this the world is well aware;
I want to scoff at them
for thinking they have ever even glimpsed you.

for tucked inside the folds of your heart
are pieces of well-worn art
-which untrained eyes will never see-

and

I am honored that you share
your hidden canvases
with me.

 

Author's Note

okay i find it kind of hot that people keep thinking this is a love poem to a guy, but it's actually a poem (filled with love) to a friend, my dear jeanmarie marchese :)

Reviews

[Adam Greenfield]

And we are honored, as well, that you share with us.

This was a great piece. I love the structure, how there's no rhyme or reason but it flows almost magically. Example:

Recalling the way
our minds collide
(the gentle way) you confide
in me

How your voice becomes a breeze
as you delve -delicately-
into the sections of your soul

time has slowly
sutured
up.

This section really stood out to me. Long sentences mixed with short ones and yet each line is as powerful as the ones before and after it. Very well crafted.

I also love the word choices, such as "when breathing has lost its benefits" and "ethereal eyes."

I am very jealous of your talents, Kara. I hope your travels are going well and I look forward to reading your fantastic blogs and inspirations.

[dusk1107]

I must say you are truly a talented artist. The word choices are splended and the way it flows is delicate and beautiful. It is a delightful illustation of the love between to friends - a deep and rare connction is very obvious. The person who influnced this poem would be honored at the splendind work.

[Xenion Ra]

I love the way you savor every part of this person, like you're completely absorbed in them...Excellent write! It feels classic and cherished, like memories that last a lifetime!

[emz]

I really liked this... to me it was about soul-mates... and how such a treasure it is to know someone as deep and intimate as they know you.... not many people have the privilage of finding such pure friendship, you are obviously one of the lucky ones... lovely work

emz x

[Taja B.]

Wow. This poem is so beautiful. It expresses a great friendship so well, so originally and so powerfully, with excellent imagery and diction.

This is a very honorable and heartfelt poem, and I throughly enjoyed this.

Thanks for sharing.

[Kelly D. Burris]

yea, I thought it was for her, after reading your blog. What a wonderful piece to honor how friends open up and share with each other the deepest things of the heart. A timeless piece.
Kelly

[Kelly Scheppers]

Friendship is a wonderful thing.

I wish you both the best!

[Jeanmarie Flaherty]

May I start off by saying. I effing LOVE you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I would quote, but I would feel...oh, I don't know, silly. How does one review words written on oneself?

It's so you and I suppose pieces of me are woven in here, but I do appear so much more beautiful when penned with your voice. You're absolutely divine...amazing.


Not much more for me to say except I MISS YOU....so very, very much.



i love you kara emily krantz (the woobie girl is in my lap)

[Anhedonia 1349]

I find it kind of interesting that so many people interpret this as a love poem; I find it even more interesting that people actually think this is written to a guy. I mean, I can see how the strong emotion you convey can be automatically linked to a romantic relationship; I can also envision one lover enjoying a similar glimpse into the "hidden beauties" of their partner. At the same time, I find it odd that anyone would relate the "fragrance [of] saffron-tinted sunshine" with a guy. Period. I suppose one could argue that poetry exists as poetry simply because of the looseness and openness of interpretation that we as readers get to enjoy; of course, as a reader, I wouldn't be able to argue. I just think that people should maybe read a little deeper into the lines themselves before they create some mind-altering assumptions about the background and prologue of the piece they're analyzing. But I digress....

I totally feel the vibrance and energy of older Krantz here, which I totally love. It makes me tremble to the very depths of my being to realize that among all changing, evolving world, the true being of who you are and what you have to say goes unchanged. That is absolutely remarkable. It goes without saying, then, that I could pinpoint any number of lines and trace each back to some earlier work of yours in which some fragment of your emotional being has conveyed similar imagery with similar beauty. Take, for instance, the imagery that these stanzas combine to illustrate:

"I think of you with the same fragrance
as saffron-tinted sunshine
and forgotten daisy dreams....
When breathing has lost its benefits
and my path has been covered
with petals
I think of you...
How your voice becomes a breeze
as you delve -delicately-
into the sections of your soul"

I see nature in your words. I feel it. I smell the scents and I feel the breeze. I can almost taste the poignancy of a vivid, Spring morning in which all of nature has combined to synthesize something beautiful and unique and pure. I feel that in your words much as I can feel, say, a delectible Autumn afternoon when reading the words of Whitman or Thoreau. And that to me, Kara, is truly remarkable. Of that, I would change nothing.

On the other hand, I feel that the words you convey here are more fragmented and disconnected than perhaps they should be. And of course, I'm not using the generalization that fragmented poetry is at all bad; I mean, who doesn't love to read some classical piece of Elliot or Dickenson in which the very syntax itself shakes loose some dark, brooding memory that perhaps one had hidden away. But at the same time, I feel that the piece of poetry you're presenting isn't necessarily meant to do that; it's not meant to stop me and cause me to delve deeply into anything in particular. I feel, rather, that I should be flowing along a silky path of words and linguistics and along a path that takes me straight into the heart of your friend. To me, some of the line breaks and syntactual pauses seem to hinder that journey and make it all seem a bit too uncertain. Here's what I would maybe do....

"I think of you with the same fragrance
as saffron-tinted sunshine
and forgotten daisy dreams.
And whenever breathing has lost its benefits
and my path has been covered with petals,
I think of you.

Only then can I recall the way
our minds collide and
the gentle way you confide in me.
I breathe softly as your voice becomes a breeze,
and as you delve delicately
into the sections of your soul
that time has slowly sutured up.

Yet as your ethereal eyes meet mine,
you place these pieces to my palm
and I am allowed a glimpse at
your hidden beauty.
And though the world is well aware of your beauty,
I want to scoff at them
for thinking they have ever even glimpsed you.
For tucked inside the folds of your heart
are pieces of well-worn art
which untrained eyes will never see;
but I - I too am honored that you share
your hidden canvases
with me. "

If the ideas were reanalyzed and reworked so that similar thoughts and feelings were more consistently grouped together, I feel that the piece would seem more natural and more complete. Though this is the possible upside, the downside is that your piece would require a smaller number of lengthier, fuller stanzas; and from what I recall of your older works, you were never really fond of such. But hey: it goes to show that two poets can feel the same emotions and enjoy the same symbolisms within a piece of writing and still disagree on something as petty as syntax. :)

Overall, I think the piece is delightful. And though I know this is a bit late, I had been promising to come out of retirement and to throw a review or two your way; now that summer has fully convened, I'm presented with more time and will (hopefully) make it around here to enjoy your pieces more now than ever. I'm glad I can still do that.

[Hedra Helix]

bomb! thats it, just bomb!

[MAC]

:) this is beautiful Kara......not much more to add. a poem from one beautiful soul to another.