when the world was new (and so was i)

"all is possible," mommy whispers, tucking a curl behind my ear.

eighteen years later i realize she only meant in that moment

and that moment is long past,

almost forgotten, save the subtle scent of lilac

and the fantastic hope

[she could be right].

 

i faintly recall saffron summer days

where i was amazed at the way the trees

were portals to another land

and the feel of their bark upon my hands

was sublime...

transporting me to another place,

another time.

 

the feeling of prickers (almost beautiful)

in the lines they left against my skin,

for their ragged tips were markers

of my journey.

and the dynamic quest i held within.

 

"all is possible," mommy assures me, pushing on my boots

as i press down, wrapped in mittens and earmuffs

and cocoa kisses.

little did i know she meant in that moment

(and that moment is long faded)

save for the lingering wisp of memory

and the marshmallow way

she hugged me.

 

somehow the feel of snow slipping inside my boots

-so uncomfortable- at the time

brings forth remnants of giggling abandon.

snow in hair, falling into eyes,

snow snow everywhere

*sparkling* with the sunshine.

 

"all is possible," mommy whispers once more into my ear,

noting the dark shadows beneath my eyes.

little do i know (this next part)

is up to me,

and if i could only see the magic in the trees

i could try again.

-this time with an appreciation-

for the prickers

against my skin.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Phil R Jacobsen]

somehow the feel of snow slipping inside my boots

Fantastic. I grew up in the San Bernardino Mountains and it brought back quite a few memories. I mean, I know it's about a mother and daughter but I could still relate without questioning myself too much.

Phil

[Carrie Montgomery]

this is such a great description of the innocence of childhood (and the loss of). Such vivid pictures are painted here, it is almost like looking at childhood photographs instead of reading a poem. You are so very talented! Great work, Emily.

[Adam Greenfield]

One of the greatest things about this piece is the feeling I get from it. It's a very poetic, gentle reminder to never take things for granted whether it is good or bad. Now, on to the critique....

I really love the flow and word placement of this. There is a subtle rhyme in some of the stanzas and it really strengthens that "poetry" feeling to me. I also enjoyed the images you used of the tree and prickers and the snow.

Wonderful write, Kara, as always.

[Jaismith]

The imagery is powerful and it seems to pull you in aand imerse you in the senses of nature. I really like this peice and the line that had the biggest effect on me had to be;
'the feeling of prickers (almost beautiful)
in the lines they left against my skin,
for their ragged tips were markers
of my journey.
and the dynamic quest i held within.'
Thanks for awakening the feelings of being a child again, i didn't realise i had missed them.
Jai

[Chad Wesley Allbrett]

Thank you I love this, I mean it; it reminds me of the good place that childhood was, the abandon, lack of worry, and that feeling of being taken care of. The world looks so much different now then it did then, (obviously), but the images you wrote bring to mind things, distant, happy, and long ago and gone.

[[untitled]]

A gorgeous piece of writing! Youthful innocence, youthful hope-- a remembrance of those virgin years, contrasting with the deflation of hope with the advent of experience, unspoken, but lurking on the horizon.

Great imagery, strong idea, and wonderful writing.

[IMOGEAN]

I love poetry about childhood, and could feel my own, as I read your words.

As we grow older, the past seems like another world.

In the now, as we remember the smells, the colors and the way we felt, it can seem much more brilliant than at the time.

Memories are to be cherished, and just as you have remembered how the bark of a tree felt on your little child hands of the past, be aware of the feelings surrounding you now.

Live every moment to the fullest, feeling the wind on your face, and smelling the springtime air just as if it were your very first time.

That way, you will never look back, and wish you had....

Thank you, Kara...

Imogean~

[Choosing Life]

All is possible in that moment....

What a great example of how years and prickers, changes the form of hope and possiblity,
and the work of life is placed on shoulders that aren't sure if they are equipped.

You wrote this like a script, so descriptive. You captured the flight of hope beautifully. Displayed here is the comfort of child like wonderment clashing with adult realities.

Amazing piece/peace...

[Collette]

i faintly recall saffron summer days
where i was amazed at the way the trees
were portals to another land
and the feel of their bark upon my hands
was sublime...
transporting me to another place,
another time.



The imagery in this piece is overwhelming, especially those lines.... you literally dragged my mind into the places you described. I could FEEL the tree, see the little girl of so many summers ago...jesus, THAT is something special. I can relate to the struggle of feeling something, anything. It seems as children we assume everything is rosy-tinted forever. Such simple things we take for granted....
You did such a nice job bringing the entire experience to life, and your talent is undeniable. Thank you for sharing!

[J. Ackson Jr.]

"i faintly recall saffron summer days
where i was amazed at the way the trees
were portals to another land"

Beautifully written Kara. I'm telling you, you've always been one of my favorite writers on WC (shh! don't tell). You have an amazing gift for words, descriptions and concepts.

I think most people can connect to this piece, it embodies a beautiful archetype of youth. I suppose that we all wish we could go back to those days that were all too fleeting.
Great Write Kara!!

"the feeling of prickers (almost beautiful)
in the lines they left against my skin,
for their ragged tips were markers
of my journey."

I guess we all get pricked a few times in life's journey.. embrace those battle scars ;)

-j.

[Raef C. Boylan]

"somehow the feel of snow slipping inside my boots
-so uncomfortable- at the time"
[Simple lines and yet they do actually make the reader feel it happen! Crazy.]


"i faintly recall saffron summer days
where i was amazed at the way the trees
were portals to another land
and the feel of their bark upon my hands
was sublime...
transporting me to another place,
another time." - the tone and rhythm of this stanza are both perfect; the content and sentiment are lovely.

This is a good piece; tinged with both nostalgia and troubled reflection.
You took us back for a moment, to the bonds with nature formed in childhood.
I don't think that was the intent, but the other parts seem a bit personal. Good use of refrains and repeated comfort scenes, to mark a contrast between then and now.

Overall, great work.
Thanks for posting it.