kill me with casualty

You kill me with casualty
(the latent apathy in your eyes)
There’s a determined drumbeat
urging me to leave
but I’m already grieving
so I stay.
too dumb too numb too in love
to go away.

 

 

You stab me with sensitivity
(I’m awash in your wounds)
I have a feeling
I’m unsealing my heart
and a part of me whispers ‘you fool’
for his casualty can be cruel
and my heart is as delicate as a dove.

 

 

You awe me with assumptions
(expectations I will never meet)
consistently you claim this untrue
but, oh, the way I lose my fire to you.
Sometimes I’m too cold
(oftentimes too old)
I’m afraid of folding up
and fading away.
so I stay and I pray…

 

 

Let’s not hurt ourselves today.

Reviews

[Amberlight]

Love this line: "too dumb too numb too in love to go away." I wrote a story called: Killing her with kindness, similar idea. You have a lot of gems in here, that one could easily miss by reading it only once: "part of me whispers, you fool’ for his casualty can be cruel "

[Mr. Lopez]

This poem hits way too close to home. I have to agree with Jess, The casual love treatment can hurt more then the cruel. At least with the cruel you know where you stand. To have your heart handled with such casual manners is a forshadowing of the pain to come , yet why do we still walk blindly into the oh so obviouse trap? your poem says it perfectly.... Dumb and in love. WE artist can sometimes be the biggest suckers for love or a close proximity of. Great poetry from a great poet. I loved it !!

[Gandré]

ohhh this is sweet.... "You stab me with sensitivity
(I�m awash in your wounds)
I have a feeling
I�m unsealing my heart
and a part of me whispers �you fool� " ======>>>>>>>>you just don't stop make me wonder, and you work out everything so nicely, every crisis....and writ about. I love it.

[Kara Rae Garland]

Your use of the word "casualty" reminds me of the time Kurt Loder brought up its usage with Jewel when he was interviewing her and they were discussing her poetry book, A Night Without Armor. I thought the way he brought it up on air was kinda rude though.

Here's a transcript of the conversation:
http://www.mtv.com/news/articles/1430602/19981125/nulljewel_pop_.jhtml

[Jess Myers]

Yes, yes, yes to the sentiment. I can take somebody being overtly cruel. Usually it's just their problem, but to be treated casually by somebody you care about is crushing. Like a breezy-cool checkup phonecall from a recent ex. I hate that.

In terms of the writing, you have a nice flowing style, and you're fantastic with words and the way they seem to dance around one another. You've got the right idea in the rhythm, but I think it's too general. I can connect with the overarching sentiment, but I didn't see the aha! moments, the little things that we all notice that are in some way illustrative of the overarching idea. Keep working with this.

[Zachary Dolan]

purposeful cruelty is harsh...

but I agree, having someone that means a lot to you treat you casually is brutal...

[Shannon Drake]

and this will be my second favorite.


so i only have 2..
and theyre BOTH yours!


.. thats gotta say something.


this one.. just.. ahh. =]

[Shannon Drake]

wow. i assume this is one of your older peices. But.. wow. this is amazing. i felt every single line--and thats how i like it.
I cant even describe how much i feel for this. its just.. im almost speachless.

"You awe me with assumptions
(expectations I will never meet)
consistently you claim this untrue
but, oh, the way I lose my fire to you."

--that completely astounded me. My favorite lines.. maybe that i have ever read.
and that could even be an understatement.

[Chris Hansen]

very nice. I really enjoy this

[Trisha Clark]

You took the words straight out of my heart.