Chapter 7: Pain from all areas

my eyes opened; i was in bed, then like a flash i remembered what just happened.  "could i really like Isac?  he is a boy, thats just not right,"  i whispered to myself.  then i turned to joseph, no words, no thoughts, just any other bloody razor blade.  i thought to myself, "yeah right."  as i glanced at joseph again i started to feel sharp pains, my wrists started to ache something feirce.  these cuts were too deep, deeper than ever before.  these pains were not leaving as i was starting to feel the after affect.  why do people cut, why did i cut myself.  its not helping the situation.  then i realized the pain was helping me get my mind off of Isac.

my body was weak, but i managed to pick myself up.  i realized, as i got up, that my bed was full of blood, "s**t," i said out loud.  not only was there blood soaking up my sheets, but i've lost a good amount of blood.  i took the sheet off my bed and wrapped it around my arm.  now i had this big blob of sheet suffocating my arm.  i went to the kitched to see if there was any peroxide.  i had to decend a longer than before stair case but i managed. 

when i got to the kitchen i found a note.  it was from my mother, who else would it be from.  it read:

"there's some frozen burritos in the freezer that you can microwave for dinner.  I'm sorry that its not much but i havent been able to get home long enough.  I'm really sorry honey, but tomorrow i promise you i will take you out for dinner.  we will have a good time to bond again :)  i love you and i hope youre managing without your annoying mother.  i love you sweetie, but you know that already.  love, your mom"

i turned the letter around to see a sticker of a smilie face winking at me.  truthfully i didnt think anything of my mom always being gone, if anything i did miss her.  but i didnt deserve a mom like her.  i just sat the note aside.  then i saw another paper, but this one was a flyer.  it was neon green with black ink.  it had a half pipe with some skaters riding it.  it said, "local skate board comp this thursday."  it then said a date and a time.  it was after school.  "thursday," i thought to myself, "thats in two days."

i opened the same counter that my tylonal was in and reached for the peroxide.  i quickly poured it onto a paper towl i found in front of me.  then i unwrapped the sheet and layed the towl on my wrist.  it stinged but i was used to the pain.  then i rewrapped up the towl and i went to my default white refrigerator and slid open the bottom to reveil a freezer.  in it i discovered the burritos.  i pulled one out and stuck it in the microwave for a couple minutes.  as i waited for the beep of the microwave i started to think out loud, "isac is always caring around a skate board, maybe..."  *BEEP BEEP BEEP*  the microwave went off as my reflexes told me to open it and take out the hot burrito.  i took it to the table and poured some water from a pitcher.  i started to eat the burrito in solitude.  the blood loss affected my appetite though.  i was only able to force half of the burrito down my throat.  but i was able to chug the water down.  i went to the pitcher and refilled my glass and chugged one more time.

i went up to my room and opened the bathroom door.  i stepped in and closed the door behind me.  i took off my clothes after i unwrapped the sheet.  i stepped into the shower and i turned both knobs inward.  the water was cool at first then it started to warm up.  my cuts stinged.  i looked down at the water and saw the water mixed with red blood.  i started to feel faint.  i turned the knobs to the opposite direction and stepped out of the shower.  i dragged myself to my dresser and pulled out some green silk boxers and but them on.  i jumped in my bed and i cant remember if i fell asleep of fainted.

in the morning when i woke up i felt more energy in my body than what i had last night.  i put on a baby blue never shout never shirt, they were one of my favorite bands.  they inspired me to sing once upon a time.  then i put on some dark blue skinny denim jeans.  i just slipped on some straw sandels.  and last, i put on a white boys like girls sweater, another band i idolized, to hide the cuts.  i was just hoping i wouldnt stain the sweater.  then i went outside and saw felicity and her mom waiting for me in the same baby blue lincoln as yesterday.  her mom was telling us a joke about her days working at the prison, i tried to listen but i still didnt feel right.  i must of lost too much blood.  but with an over nights sleep, and a day nap, i should be feeling good enough for school.

when her mom dropped us off felicity told me that she had to meet up with karen to help her with an exam for reading or something.  so i continued to walk in solitude.  then i saw amy up ahead.  she glanced at me at the same time so we started to walk to each other.  amy gave me a "gangster" hand shake.  amy was pretty pale, with vibrant red hair and honey eyes.  she was at an average height, and she was fit (she loved to excersize).  she dresses kind of scene, but tries to talk like a gangster, and as said earlier, she had her ditzy moments.  then she said, "hi my friends, whats the happs?"  i gave a weak smile and said, "not much, well actually im not feeling so hot."  she felt my fore head and said, "what are you talking about yo, you feel really hot."  i gave her a dumb look.

then she completly ignored the fact that i was really sick and started talking about her boyfriend andrew.  he was cool and all, but he was my cousin.  so it was kind of weird.  truthfully though, it was all good, because she was making me laugh, for all the wrong reasons though.  she would say really mushy things about him that were ridiculous but hilerious.  she then slapped my on my wrist saying, "hey its not funny, he is my medication and i need him."  i wanted to laugh but the fact that she slapped my wrist clouded my laughter.  then my knees hit the floor.  the pain was to powerful, i started making a noise like a snake as amy asked what was wrong.  i replied, "nothing, dont worry about it."  she wasnt that dumb, she knew something wasnt right and then rolled up my sleeve.  her eyes went wide as she helped me up.

i could tell she didnt know what to say or how to deal with the situation.  so i told her i was gonna go to class now.  she just knodded her head and looked in the other direction and started walking.  i sighed, i wasnt the kind of guy that wanted to let everyone know my problem.  i started to walk to my class which was at the end of the halls.  i had my head down in shame and thought.  then i bumped into someone, it was george from the other day.  but this time he wasnt alone, i was.  standing next to him was some curly haired guy that looked like he was around 17 or 18.  and behind them was a small group of emo looking girls.  then they surrounded me.  i started to get nervous as i saw sweat from my fore head touch the tip of my lips.  then the curly hair guy openend his mouth and said in an amoused voice, "hey man, i have a quick question.  is Karen your friend?"  i smirked as yesterdays events replayed in my head and without any thought i answered, "yeah, so?"  he smiled back at me and said, "that's good enough for me smart a*s," as he picked me up by the neck of the hootie.  then he punched me right in the face.  i felt a few loose teeth.  i realized i was on the ground in mud. 

i remembered that my dad bought me this sweater, thats why i treasured it, thats why tears started falling from my face.  i didnt feel the pain that they physically gave me, just the pain that my dad...

then george said, "wow thanks christopher or christian, or whatever the f**k is your name, my friends and i didnt want to get our shoes dirty.  the fact that he called my christopher, my dads name, pained me more.  i wanted to get up and teach george a lesson.  but then i felt kicks in my ribs.  i blacked out.

Author's Note

and again please ignore grammer [=

Reviews

[Felissa]

Okay i can see where the writing is beginning to evolve it's getting good like always but as i was reading i couldn't help but like notice how much you use I it kinda makes the story sound choppy like i told you before like here is an example this was near the top

i stepped in and closed the door behind me. i took off my clothes after i unwrapped the sheet. i stepped into the shower

Instead you can put a lot of these together to make it flow better like this

I stepped in and closed the door behind me. Taking my cloths off i gently unwrapped the sheet trying not irritate my cuts then i stepped into the shower.

Something like that =]

Also maybe describe the shower sorta i know this is kinda like a rough draft but im telling you this so you can maybe use it for your final. Like i scrubbed being careful. This is where i say again like your sentences are too short well for me anyway.

but other then that its awesome dude =] like really!

[Saosinkid (Death whispe..]

you guys would probably not believe me, but as i was looking for the boys like girls sweater, the song the great escape came out on my iPod. and i have all my songs on shuffle, i got nearly a 1000 songs. haha and the place i saw this sweater was on the great escape video. haha it just kind of freaked me out.