A disagreement

Took the play 'The Proposal' and did a very short modern version of my own.

Jon comes home and hears cheering in the living room. The Super Bowl is playing on the television. His wife, Chelsea, sits on the floor with friends and family around her cheering on her favorite team: The Eagles.

 

Jon: I’m home Chels, was a bit of a drag today.

 

Cheslea sits staring at the T.V. Her friends notice Jon and pay attention to him out of an awkward kindness.

 

Jon: You’d be surprised how well the Chargers are selling this year. Even with the cheaper Lexicons available as of only a few months ago, we can’t keep the Chargers in stock. Management says we’re selling twice as many …

 

Jon drops his work bags and throws his coat over the side of the chair in the living room while Chelsea continues watching the television.

 

Jon: Charges as Toyota is selling Priuses. Incredible! Especially for the Bay Area. Do you ever even see a Charger driving around town?

 

Chelsea watches the television while her friends watch John:

 

Chelsea: No, they’re boring.

 

Jon: What? We’re selling twice as many as the Prius. It must not be that boring. I wonder where all these Chargers are charging off to. If we’re selling twice as many, we’d see them parked on the streets in the mornings you’d think.

 

Chelsea: I don’t think. People should hide them if they have one. They’re boring.

 

Friends stir a bit on the couch, trying to focus in on the game in the 4^th quarter. The Eagles are down by two points and the Cowboys have the ball on the 25 yard line.

 

John: Again with the boring. What’s so boring about them? We’re selling twice as many as the Prius.

 

He walks into the kitchen watching Chelsea through the open door and grabs a coke and rum.

 

Chelsea: They look like a sea gull before he smashes into a boat. They’re boring.

 

Jon: What? Are you boating now? Where’d the boats come from? Hun, we sell cars. We’re selling twice as many as the Prius.

 

Chelsea: Where ever the boring people live that’s where they’re taking all the Chargers. Chargers are boring cars for boring people. Priuses are at least interesting. Those things are completely silent….

 

The friends chuckle a bit on the couch. Somebody reaches into the chip bowl and crunches loudly and awkwardly on too many chips. The crumbs fall on his stomach and a woman looks at him with a smirk.

 

Jon: The Charger must be a car for the people, then. The common people. They’re selling twice as fast regardless of their noise. And the sound of the Charger is beautiful anyways. It’s the first thing we show a client when they walk in. We sit them in a detailed car inside the main office and let the engine run and echo in the buildings. Nothing boring about that. It seems to impress. We’re selling twice as many as the Prius!

 

A random potato chip goes flying in Jon’s direction. Chelsea is still watching the game.

 

Chelsea: I’d buy a used electric car from the early 90’s before I bought a Charger, Jon. The Charger is over priced, bulky and flaccid.

 

The friends freeze on the couch and Jon shifts his feet behind them staring at the chip on the floor.

 

Jon: What? First boats now failed penises? Look, those electric cars from the 90’s were total failures. You had to charge them every 2 hours! It takes 2 hours to get anywhere inside the Bay.

 

Chelsea: That’s fine, interesting people go interesting places.

 

Jon: No no, the Charger will give you nearly 30 miles a gallon now and…

 

Jon cruches down on the potato chip from the floor.

 

Jon:  … with a 20 gallon tank you could get half way to Florida on a single tank. Maybe two.

 

Chelsea: Florida is boring. It’s for old people and boats.

 

Jon: Again with the boats and the failed penises!

 

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