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A poem I wrote when i was sixteen, I had an eating disorder at the time, but I'm happy to say I'm better now. I usually don't title my poetry, I might make a title one day though.

I sit here in the night,

Watching as the minutes fade into the past

slowly, but still much too fast for my taste

Why can I never sleep?

Why am I feeling that old, familiar feeling?

I always think, fooled again, each time

"It's gone.  I'm free from me at last."

Only for it to be brought back from the grave

of my memory, sprung to life by the

Vicious beast that dwells within me

It's a reminder that I am never free

Only allowed occasionally to see what

life is, then ripped away to my prison of

Despair and rigid gloom, caked in an

icing of self-pity, enraptured in its all

Like a child lost in the sweetness of a

lollipop or similar likes

Just as much unhealthy and heart clogging

I tell myself this can't go on forever

I have to beat it

I have to take a stand

And put my foot down to my own authority

and...

Exhale

But still yet, I hold my own breath, though

I know I cannot survive without it

Distractions ease the pain, but never

numb it, regretfully

I know I need rest, many things are brought

With a new day,

But why fight it?

It is all the easier to give in to whatever

controls me, that of which I feel is not

Myself, however differently I wish

I plunge all of this onto the paper before me,

Wasting time that I need desperately for

rest,

Even knowing the ink spilled here freely will

not rescue me from the demons I have to

Face and expel

With my head held high

And my soul filled with strength

No matter how I prepare for the battle, I am

Never quite strong enough

to win the war waged on my mind

Author's Note

I apologize if the lines seem weird or if there are grammatical errors, I like to play with my words. ;)