why is this?

A Poem by sammy sam sam

im soo confused right now.
im soo shakey, full of anxiety.

why would she do me like this?
now im just trapped in my mind.

soo now im breathing hard and sighhing
my heart beating, love depriving
i should say that i'd start crying
but i cant couse all her lying
i just might as well be dying
theres no point to keep on trying
would rather, be an angel flying
couse down here, im slowly frying
im a christan aint no lying
and im proud i cant deny it
so take me God, and please just end it
my whole life i try'd not sinning
why you do this is beyond me
is it morals??..is it callings?
did i upset you? im soo sorry
did you send her to disolve me?
what i do? i said im sorry
everyday she seems to claw me
getting deeper and more salty (burns more)
can you hear me? i am calling
gettin desperate almost crawling
soo much obsticals, that stall me
they just keep me feeling sorry
so i realize that lifes brawling
its a game like an Atari
but the thing is, cant restart
im on the brink, im soo departed
and crazy, my mind is starting
after this, my heart gets hardend
just like the others, my trust sharpens