idk

I must have some diease

i ask God

whys is it me

or am i cursed?

i hear i'm cursed

but i'm not sure if i believe in "curses"

all i know is that i'm worthless

and my ego, people hurt this

used to hurting

so i'm changing

getting problems

myself i'm hating

i wounder if i did this to myself

did i care too much what they thought

now here i am as my brain rotts 

i wish anxiety would stop

i've been wishing

for the past three years

how sad

here i am and 4 times bad

how sad

i'm not sure what i have had

but now its gone 

i'm living without something i'm supposed to have in my mind

guess i'm crazy now

i'm loosing my mind

not intellectually.

but to where i can't be free

seriously

theres something inside me

mentaly

this feelings disguising

so here i am

waiting to get worse

i need to help myself

but i have no time

i guess i'm allowing this to happen

but honestly i'm not

no-good healthcare has me hott

sweating, price won't drop

who cares right? 

it's my problem

i'll just be another people pass by

thinking "what is wrong with that guy?"

he may be on drugs

he may just be mental

wounder what he goes through

but they can't even imagine

i'm not handicap or nuthing

matter fact i am quite handsome

well

thats what they think

they don't feel my problems

like the way i think

the way i breath

the way i feel my posture

i don't feel the way i should be

now i'm thinking bout it

it just may last for days

omg i feel this way

makes reality too vauge

makes my mind the other way

i cannot function

thats been my life

and more to come 

the end 

 

 

Reviews

[Carolann Dowsett]

This is very heartfelt and full of pain and frustration. I really hope you find a way out of the fog and find some peace.