Rewrite history

History cannot be rewritten, but it can be viewed from different perspectives, and the perspective depends on who you are. The good sides can be highlighted or hidden depending on the box you fit into

He gave us the land we live on,
He saved everyone from drowning.
But did you know he beat his wife,
Ruining hundreds of lives?
You probably didn’t�"

his achievements overshadow that, right?

She left her family, abandoned her child,
Had countless lovers, broke every rule.
But did you know she invented the medicine
That saves your children’s lives?
You probably didn’t�"

after all, she’s a woman.
Someone else must have helped her, right?

Author's Note

I feel like this poem still lacks something and seems incomplete. Should I leave it as it is, or should I try adding a few more stanzas? What do you guys think?

Reviews

[LisaCarol]

Hi Sailesh - Thank you for sharing this poem. It is very provocative and makes the reader think. No human is perfect, we all make mistakes. This poem reminds us of this dichotomy. I think it is fine as it is, but if you feel you want to add more stanzas, it will be even more powerful. Great work!

[sailesh]

Thank you for your thoughtful review! The purpose of my poetry was to highlight how people often overlook the wrongdoings of men, focusing only on their achievements. But when it comes to women, every time I talk about their accomplishments, there’s always someone who objects, saying, "But she was a horrible person because she did..."

I feel like adding a few more paragraphs could help convey my message more clearly. The first two stanzas could serve as examples of this double standard, and in a couple more stanzas, I could further explain the point I’m trying to make.

[LisaCarol]

I’d agree that if you added more stanzas where men are applauded and women disparaged, it will convey the message you are trying to make.

[sailesh]

Yes I was thinking about that, Thank you so much

[Coyote Poetry]

I am 1/2 Ojibwa. In the Native American belief. The woman was the strong one. In the USA. Women had lost 50 years of struggle to become equal in pay, respect. I believe. The women must re-gain their place in our world. It is a sad world when women because just baby makers. I hope we lose the men who don't respect life, children and women. We need people of hope. Powerful and worthwhile words shared. Thank you.
Coyote

[emmajoygreen]

The reasoning you offer come as surprise or shock, depending on how this or any reader interprets your fine words, sailesh. My only suggestion could be that after the ?... you put the next phrase separately, underneath it..

You probably didn’t:
after all, she’s a woman.
Someone else must have helped her, right?

It's your very finely laid poem, is entirely up to you, dear friend.

[sailesh]

Thank you for the suggestion. I will edit the poem and break the sentence, that makes more sense.