let yourself feel

You lost your father

The man who made you smile when you wanted to cry

The man who was always willing to listen

The man who made your problems his own

 

You lost your father

The man who could make anyplace a home

Who would always cradle you when you were sad

The man who would always dry your tears

 

You lost your father

The man you confided in

The man you trusted

The man you loved

 

And now I see you stand there not one tear slides down your cheek

You stand there denying the pain with all your might

You stand like a brick wall unable to move

You stand emotionless...

 

Let yourself feel....

Let yourself see...

Let yourself come to terms

 

Your pain is my pain

When you cry I cry

When you feel I feel

 

Let yourself feel....please....let yourself feel....

 

Author's Note

This is about a man in my church who just died, I was VERY close to his son. His son and he were best friends, they relied on each other, they were more than father and son, they were best friends. And when the son lost his dad he became lost, he doesn't bother to show emotion, he won't even admit to being hurt over it. He stands like an emotionless wall.

Reviews

[PaperHearts]

Wow, this was a really touching poem, inspired by a very sad yet very real story. I liked the flow of this piece and thought that it almost read like lyrics to a song. There seemed to be a real sense of insight and maturity in this piece that I admired, and thought that the last line was the perfect, yet most heartbreaking way to end the piece. Great work,
~PaperHearts

[Jordan]

I think it's a good start. The emotion kind of felt forced but I could still feel your sincerity. There were a couple things (the "let yourself feel" line and the form of the poem, in particular) that felt a bit cliche, and I feel like those things robbed it of some of its power. But other than that, it was pretty good.

[Intern'l Shultzfeather]

you are taking steps in different directions with your writing. Very nice Sarah. I counted over eight emotions you addressed with this poem.

[MuSe Ampoule]

Beautiful poem Sarah. This poem cries out for the man without a voice to express his pain. The structure echoed the subject as well, very well written...each stanza tight and controlled like it's fighting its own battle of emotion.

[Shawn Killian]

I haven't lost my dad, never met him. i have lost my sister and i want you to know that if you wrote something this beautiful for me, i'd die from love. You're amazing

[ClosingAccount]

Beautiful written!

[Misty Blue Eyes]

so many guys are like that. they think if we see them cry they are weak.. or maybe hes not sure how to let it all out.. i hope he lets it out soon for his sake

[Zane]

This is very well written. It almost made me cry. I love the repetition.