Holes in the wind

Will stars align, or will outside noises shape the frame of mind?

With time hands become cut and bruised, used for whatever one wants.

Selfish ambitious ride along with

Meaning in the passenger seat;
Replacing thoughtful action

With frutiless movements.

Moving on to the next phase while we wait for time to arrive.

We wait, we wait, until days pass by.

Reviews

[Maglia Weaver Twill]

Great stuff, (putting it mildly) I am going to type the words as I see them, because they have such lofty thought, and send a person soaring: (I'm just doing TYPEOVER for my sake as once taught for a soak in effect).

'Will stars align, or will outside noises shape the frame of mind?/With time hands become cut and bruised, used for whatever one wants./Selfish ambitious ride along with?/Meaning in the passenger seat;/Replacing thoughtful action/With fruitless movements./Moving on to the next phase while we wait for time to arrive./We wait, we wait, until days pass by.'

The condensed block there does not do the lines justice to mimic the pace at which they were either written or meant to be spoken. Perhaps I merely "scratch your back" or "rub the writer's belly" to say you are an excellent teacher; though without proper feminine reserve I would rather say and do: you have taught synthesis and the wisdom of opposition, counter, you represent, ethos, pathos and logos itself! Others knew before but I did not know until now, in this terrible hour

[mendedwords]

Wow! First I want to say thank you for the review, what I appreciate the most is your in depth analysis of this piece. My aim is to become a better writer, and to do that I need the input of great writers to point out areas that I can improve. Again thank you.