Seeds

In fallow fields

I lie a waste

Trumpet birds

Eating in haste

Desperate measures

Have led me here

Forgetting reason

Running in fear

Wonton lust

Carried the day

Legs strength failed

Fallen where I lay

In fallow field

No one to trust

Cover me over

And turn me to rust

Reviews

[Clockwork]

I like the reference to the trumpet birds. I think that it would be really nice if you said a bit more about them. It would also be positive if you described the circumstances that made the speaker run. We know very vague this about why he ran at this point, but you could make it really unique by adding some more circumstance. They can be mysteries, but just some more of it.

Loved the word fallow. That is one of the things that pulled me through the poem.

I think that it would be a good thing if you changed the word rust to something else at the end of the poem because it does not make sense with what you have already built to that point. In addition, people don't rust.

Overall I liked this poem and I am glad that I stopped by to read it.

[...]

. you're a master of brevity ...
. i found the second stanza very compelling ...
. reminds me of a critical phase in life when i was just completely lost ...

[allie_arrowz]

i loved the last stanza. very pretty. :) i like how easily you connect your feelings with nature.

[Harmonica winds]

Liked that kast stanza, there is some truth within your words. : )