I Promise, Part 1

Love isn't always what it seems.

There was a time when I thought that I really knew who my friends were; that I really knew about them at a personal level. I didn’t think they had much to hide. I mean, everybody has their secrets; parts of their lives that they tell no one no matter what the circumstance. But I never thought that any my friends would hide something so big from me. I mean, people seemed to trust me. I had really close friends who put a lot of faith in my trust. As much as I was appreciated and liked, my heart was still only mine though. I was okay with that, though. I figured that if my heart stayed with me, I was in control of it. That way, I could focus more on my goals of becoming something, rather than waste time on relationships. What I didn’t take into consideration was the fact that even when my heart is in my possession, I am not in control of it. It was after the moment I realized that, nothing would ever be the same again. I started senior year of high school with the same ambition and drive for success that I always had. I had elected almost all honors-level classes; I had a great social life; and I still somehow had time for theatre. I walked onto campus the first day and immediately ran into friends.

“Yo, Erik!” I heard.

“Hey, Corbin, how was your summer?” I said.

“Eh, boring as Hell. How was yours?”

“Alright, I guess. Can’t really complain. Got your schedule yet?”

“Yeah,” he said. He put down his backpack and reached inside for his schedule. I couldn’t help but notice how... I’m not sure how to say this. He looked... good. His dark hair, brown eyes... Wait, no, it’s nothing, I thought repeatedly.

“Nice,” I said, giving him my schedule as well.

“Ah damn. You’re still doing theatre, right?”

“Yeah,” I said.

“Good, ‘cause that’s the only thing we’re gonna be doing together in school this year,” he said, laughing slightly.

“Ah, that sucks. Ah well. Theatre it is, then!” I said laughing. He laughed as well. He did look sort of disappointed, though.

“Well, I gotta get to class, man. See ya in theatre this afternoon,” he said.

“Yep, talk to ya later,” I said.

Corbin and I had been friends since freshman year. He sat next to me in math class. We became friends when we found out we were both in theatre, along with like four other classes. We both took German as our foreign language class, and spoke it endlessly to each other when we knew how to, or when we didn’t want people around us to know what we were saying. I’m not saying we said anything dirty or bad, but if one of us wanted to make a comment that we’d rather not be heard, like, “Yeah, good one, dumbass,” we’d say it in German so that said dumbass couldn’t understand us. Then they’d get confused and we’d start laughing. Being bilingual is fun.

As I was walking to class, I thought about what I felt when I saw Corbin. What’s going on? I wondered. It wasn’t the first time that I had those thoughts for him, but I had been able to get it out of my mind in the past. Why am I still thinking about it now? I wondered. I tried to think about something else until I got to class. Maybe my first class will distract me, I thought, at least until I saw what class it was: AP Calculus. Damn it, I thought. My mind’s gonna be wandering like crazy in there. How am I gonna stop thinking about Corbin in that class?

I walked into class and took a seat. A few others were there already, and I knew most of them from last year’s math class.

One saw me and ran over to me.

“Erik!” she said flamboyantly, nearly screaming.

“Kylie!” I said just as flamboyantly. We ran to each other and hugged.

“How was my favorite gay boy’s summer?” Oh, did I forget to leave that detail out? My bad...

“Oh my God, boring as Hell,” I said. My tone of voice changed when I talked to Kylie. I was a little bit more... feminine. Corbin knew and all, but talking to Kylie was different still. You know, it’s how you talk differently with your best friend than you do with just one of the guys or girls.

“Oh, that sucks, kid. Were there any, you know, chicos to make it a little interesting at least?” she asked.

I laughed and said, “No, still single. I told you, I’m not getting into that sort of s**t until everything’s all set with college and such. I gotta stay focused, ya know?”

“Oh, f**k that,” she said. “You and I both know you’ve been eyeing a certain someone since sophomore year. A certain someone whose name starts with a C? Ends with Orbin?”

“Not this s**t again,” I said. “Corbin is a friend. I’m his gay best friend, and I’m fine with that.”

“Rumor has it he’s into the garçons as well,” she said.

“Cool, we can go check out hot guys together... as friends,” I said.

“Oh my God, Erik, just f**k each other already!”

“Naw, I’m good.”

“What. Ever,” she said. “Anyway, who’s the teacher for this class?”

“Umm, Mr. Blaine,” I said checking my schedule. “Aye, Mr. Blaine. Is he any good?”

“Not sure. Is he a new teacher?”

“Maybe, I dunno. We’ll see, eh?”

“Yep. Gotta go back to my seat before he gets in, though. See ya later,” she said.

“Aye, see ya later,” I said. I began to think, Could Corbin really be gay too? If he is, why didn’t he tell me? We’ve been best friends for like three years and he hasn’t said anything? Does he not trust me or something? Or is he really straight and I’m just being led into believing something false? This whole guessing game is a pain in the a*s...

This chain of thoughts ended once the bell rang and the teacher walked into the room.

“Good morning, all. I’m Mr. Blaine, new here. So if any of you asked around to see if I was an a*s and no one knew, that’s why,” he said. We all laughed. Not too many teachers are that comfortable around their students, nor that informal. I’m not saying it was a bad thing; kinda refreshing, in fact. I began to think that perhaps I wouldn’t get distracted in this class, and might actually like what I’m being taught. Nice.

Class continued and I was able to keep my mind off of Corbin. The bell rang, and I went to my next class. I looked on my schedule: AP German Literature. Good, I’ll be able to pay attention in this class, I thought. I walked into the room, and saw Corbin sitting there. F**k! I thought. Corbin saw me and said “Oh yeah, and we have German together.”

With a fake laugh, I said, “Oh yeah, didn’t only like ten people sign up for this class? Why would they have two of them?”

He laughed for real and said, “Yeah, good job, hon.” Hon? I thought. He looked sort of surprised, too. Instead of calling him on it, I laughed. He said, “Yo, sit here,” pointing to the desk next to him.

“Alright,” I said. “How was your first class?” I asked.

“Eh, it’s AP Bio. How good could it possibly get?” he said.

“Yeah, that’s true. I thought you wanted to major in German or something. Why take Bio?”

“I have no clue, dude. It’s an AP class, so maybe I’ll get some scholarships or something.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” I said. “Good luck with that s**t. You’ll be able to school me in science then,” I said, laughing.

“Yeah, I can school you in science as it is,” he said and laughed.

“Dick,” I said laughing.

Dialogues like that where we were both laughing and playing a bit were the best memories. Now, I began to accept the fact that I might have some feelings for him, and the fact that they’ve been there for a couple years. Kylie was right. I’d have to tell her that later.

As German class went on, I caught a stare at Corbin every now and then. Once or twice, he caught me, smiled a little and went back to what he was doing. I determined that after class, I was gonna talk to him, set things straight, no pun intended. If he didn’t have feelings for me, I wanted to know. If he did have feelings for me, though, I wanted to make something of it. I mean, we had theatre together, which took the most of my time. We had class together, so there’s more time that we would be spending together anyway. We could even do homework together, so there’s more time together there. With him, I wouldn’t have to worry about devoting too much time to a relationship that I take it away from school.

When class was over, I went to Corbin and asked, “Can I talk to you for a second?” with a gentle voice.

He smiled, said, “Sure.” We both had the next two periods off, so we could leave campus as long as we got back in-time for our next class. I usually walked to a nearby café on Amherst Street, and Corbin usually stayed on campus and got lunch there. Today was gonna be different, though, apparently.

“Where do you wanna go?” I asked once we got off campus. Not two seconds after I asked the question did he wrap his arms around me and kiss me. I accepted his... request, so to speak, and kissed him back. We both smiled, laughed a bit, and brought our hands together.

He replied, “Somewhere nice.”

“Berkshire Café work?” I asked.

“Sure,” he said with a smile. “That sounds awesome.”

Author's Note

There are some grammar mistakes, but this story is written from the voice of a teenager. The dialogues are prone to the grammatical habits of teenagers; in other words, they are immune to the rules of English grammar.

Reviews

[Silver DeHalo]

loved it ! just put it into my reading list. KMU please :)

[compositionc]

:D
Really nice part one. It's interesting, and it moves quickly, but not too quickly. Well, you know, the whole kissing thing at the end was spontaneous, but sweet.
-goes to read part2-