Heart Ignition

I'm currently at war. Hopefully my arrow is on target.

 

It is there

The full frontal nudity of a fragmented reflection

A needless totality of human law

Always claiming

Never changing

Completely unknown as we shut our eyes and look away.

 

We don’t care

The dark coils of our hearts wrap up our gaze

In menacing splendour

Our clay brains are carefully molded

And bend to the will of the coil

Forever linked to the glimmering jade

Driven by gluttonous fire.

 

Will water rush over?

Will the soft foam of the edge

Ever pacify the excessive teeth of the shark?

Ever mute the cries of gushing blood?

Deflate ballooning greed

And light the soul?

 

Something is nothing

And nothing is everything

so I believe in something

I believe in you.

Author's Note

Feel free to go nuts! :)

Reviews

[Leah Simone]

I wasn't expecting the ending - the path to it was filled with such large boulders of challenges of mankind - it was refreshing to see the conclusion was so simple - to put your faith in another - something seldom truly done. I like the style of your writing as well, filled with metaphor and imagery without being so outlandish it becomes completely inaccessible to the reader...it flowed well, even with what might have at first glance seemed disjointed ideas. I look forward to reading more of your work.

[Lyrical Love]

I love this! Powerful write...
**It is there
The full frontal nudity of a fragmented reflection** --> my favorite lines...
how we present ourselves, looking for acceptance
while waging a war, of self. Excellent interpretation of man (and woman).
Refreshing as well, because it provoked thought.
kudos!

[Oddpoet]

My dear Exlax,
I do find your merger grasping for appropriate metaphor to be endearing, but failure is nothing to be ashamed of, in fact, I am sure one such as you has grown quite fond of the experience.

If I might quote, yes, very painfully!

"We don't care
The dark coils of our hearts wrap up our gaze
In menacing splendour"

Besides not making sense, your time would have been better spent spilling your seed into a sock or.... Let us leave that alone....LOL

I would have read the rest your drivel but one can only vomit so much! Please forgive me for my self preservation response.

As a true Poet I advise you to never use the word "We" use "I" gentle Exlax, for "We is a presumption, "I" is experience! And, is that not the Poet's aim???????

Hopefully I have "taught" you something here, perhaps not. For only when the student is ready will the teacher appear!

Hopefully you are ready.

I remain your mentor,
Oddpoet

[The Postman]

I'll remember the ending mostly. Kudos.

[Pink Poison]

This is my favorite part:

Our clay brains are carefully molded
And bend to the will of the coil
Forever linked to the glimmering jade
Driven by gluttonous fire.

Will water rush over?
Will the soft foam of the edge
Ever pacify the excessive teeth of the shark?
Ever mute the cries of gushing blood?
Deflate ballooning greed
And light the soul?

Something is nothing
And nothing is everything
so I believe in something
I believe in you.

Beautifully written. And shark DO have excessive teeth.

[Hedra Helix]

ok, that was pretty damn travely and good.

[Pj]

A fantastic write!

Loved the lines:
"Always claiming
Never changing"
AND
"so I believe in something
I believe in you." .......................You used such powerful words that stung and bit hard.

It is true that we live in a consumerist society where we'll pin point an atrocity and still look the other way. You portrayed such findings very well :D Nice job!