Who the hell do you think you are ?..
Go to hell...
Kuch nahi..
I dont want to talk to you..
That was the conversation between me and my soul..
This is all a relationship is all about..the more you expect..the more you are bogged down in the 'Sargasso Sea' of irritation and frustration..Implications of the over-passionate and possesive attitude unveiled soon and I found myself lying down..with a heavy mind, body , heart and soul..
I used to teach people..instead I used to preach this to ppl.." Get rid of your expectations from life, God , parents, friends, ppl.. and you will find no reason to cry over..life will seem beautiful , as it definitely is.."..
But ALAS!! .. I was the first one who fell prey to it..Life has been like the "BSE-Sensex" since then..
Sudden upsurges of weird but nice feelings..instant downfall of the mental map..gratified and contented from outside..and equally devastated and frustrated from inside.. gawdd..is this what I always used to dream of.. is this what I needed ? ..certainly not..
So, what can I do about it..
My soul - Get rid of every responsibility, free yourself from obligations..meditate..spiritualize..react..enlighten..but how ? , I said..
Me - Shall I dematerialize myself.. the process would take long..but will certainly take me away from the intrications of this painful life..LIVE and let LIVE..but what about my alter-ego.. it doesnt allow me to do so..it shouts out loud every moment and is the only reason I land up in trouble..
My Soul - You are not responsible for any body's happiness..you are here to be happy and the people around you will absorb the positive vibes in you..you ought to live to the fullest.. let no feeling of any sort. ruin your mental-map.. GROW..EVOLVE.MATURE..
Me- But how...the only way I can do this is.. DONT EXPECT... and thats what I do the most.. How not to EXPECT.. How to ignore.. How to hate people.. How do I cut myself apart from this institution called 'LOVE'...
My Soul - Its unreal..its a hallucination... you built it.. it doesn't exist.. THINK..ANALYZE...RETROSPECT.. what did you get from it... nothing.. leave aside the joy.. but did you evolve...no.. u didnt.. u are not the fittest among all.. you cannot SUSTAIN.. you have to die...
Thats how I died , but I am still there in the minds and hearts of people I expected from... but I am happy now.. as I EVOLVED...