Very much worth the read. I don't have much of a critique, but personally I think you could have used more beverages with a meaning. (If that makes sense) I enjoyed how you used "Your tears for in crystals of Vodka" and "Determined by gulped Irish Cream" and my favorite "Whiskey that navigates smoothly, through the cavity". I just think with your talent you could have dove deeper, if you get what I am saying. Overall I give this a 9/10 that last little thing I said about diving deeper being the last point. Unless the short and sweet chop was what you were aiming for then bravo! You can have your 10/10. :)
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Haha thanks for the feedback! HIghly appreciated! To be honest I'm actually still not at the age to .. read moreHaha thanks for the feedback! HIghly appreciated! To be honest I'm actually still not at the age to drink... actually wayyy below the age to drink. I wrote this in health class!
Very much worth the read. I don't have much of a critique, but personally I think you could have used more beverages with a meaning. (If that makes sense) I enjoyed how you used "Your tears for in crystals of Vodka" and "Determined by gulped Irish Cream" and my favorite "Whiskey that navigates smoothly, through the cavity". I just think with your talent you could have dove deeper, if you get what I am saying. Overall I give this a 9/10 that last little thing I said about diving deeper being the last point. Unless the short and sweet chop was what you were aiming for then bravo! You can have your 10/10. :)
Posted 5 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
5 Years Ago
Haha thanks for the feedback! HIghly appreciated! To be honest I'm actually still not at the age to .. read moreHaha thanks for the feedback! HIghly appreciated! To be honest I'm actually still not at the age to drink... actually wayyy below the age to drink. I wrote this in health class!
My favorite parts are:
"pleasant flame"
d
o
w
n
"morphs into a demon"
u
n
k
n
o
w
n
... and "language bouncing off ears"
Like someone else said, the poem is a wild ride!
I am glad you are back, back with a spectacular poem. I never had a drink of alcohol, that might disqualify me from commenting on the effects of alcohol... but I do know the longing of addiction, I can't start a day without coffee and find an excuse to drink several more cups although the day. I loved the format of your poem it is stunningly beautiful and cascades like a smooth drink. Well done.A very Happy 2019.
Posted 5 Years Ago
3 Years Ago
Hello! I am back from two years ago! I also have yet to drink alcohol when I posted this poem two ye.. read moreHello! I am back from two years ago! I also have yet to drink alcohol when I posted this poem two years ago. I simply observed my environment and drunk people to make this poem haha! I also read and researched a bit to get an idea about what alcohol feels like to drink.
Sachi is an observant art lover who takes pride in her strong verbal and written communication skills as she regards her love for learning. She highly values collaboration and efforts to create innova.. more..