The Beast Inside...

The beast inside…

© 2017 SachikoMochiko �" Sachi Ruaya

 

What’s worse than killing someone? Leaving them suffering alive. Now, whether or not they suffer is up to them…

 

Cracks…that’s how the light comes in.

 

You found that someone,

Who you deem; is the last piece of you

O’ but that one…that other one just �"

…

How long will your grip hold?

 

 

It’s a dark feeling; jealousy

Where green, grey and black swirls weave your heart

Like steel, poison ivy 

 

 

As your blood curdles and boils,

your red-laced eyes eyeball

That one who touched your precious

 

 

Your precious gem that you admire from afar.

Your precious one, who births a hazy warm chest.

Your precious half…the other fading half of you.

 

 

But you refrain from killing

And instead of making arrangements to prey,

You keep that one alive  but suffering from your fangs

 

Your inner beast lurks inside,

already devoured half of you and yourself.

Its true form will not feast unless you do

 

 

Your fangs…its fangs bite, drawing thick, oozy blood

Of the one you hold captive in your prison

All for that one precious one, you shed blood

 

 

Your bite…your torture…your beast

Is a reflection of the steel, poison ivy

Is a being born from your selfishness…your jealousy

 

 

But you continue to feast even when you know

Know that this beast will soon consume your flesh, Bone-clean

Because pleasure will come from ones’ suffering

 

 

You are blinded by the beast; your scarlet eyes see no more,

the beauty of your precious gem…

Blurry. Vivid. Pitch-black.

 

 

You have lost sight of your intentions,

And your precious gem’s light is no more

Now, you know: You. Are. Devoured.

 

 

You sit there on the bottom of the beast’s stomach

Living with the pure darkness of your own

Alone. With your crackling, dry heart -unable to love

 

 

After all, you were just blind.

Destined to lurk in darkness.

 

 

Emptiness. Your skin slowly peels off from the dry darkness

Slowly…painfully, in this prison, the veil is ripped

Revealing something undeniably powerful

 

You.

 

 

The bleeding wounds of which the skin is peeled

Thus, shunned the lies and unveils the truth

The truth of you embedded inside -within the beast

…

 

The light suppresses the dry darkness 

With your passion, memories, joy and love

You slice through the belly…striving for freedom once more!

 

 

Author’s Note: 

This is one of the small fragments to ready one of my upcoming masterpiece. I will write more poems like this (having the same motivational force). WORRY is next.

Author's Note

This is one of the "practice" poems so I can produce a higher quality work for a special someone of mine:)

Gosh...my punctuation is bad. Just like any other poems I post here, it ain't finished. Still more reviewing to be done. But overall, I hope you enjoy XD

=

Jealousy, eh? Just a quick note, any poem I write is nearly always based off of my true feelings and recent events/emotions.

Reviews

[KCthelastboyscout]

Raw and honest.Outstanding imagery in words and visuals. I can picture you in my head, shouting these words at the person this story is intended for. My only little critique is that there are more than a few harsh words used that I would have replaced with something different. He's not returning your love but you can't force someone to do so. Other than that brilliant as always I look forward to the rest of the story

[RacialRainbow]

Very deep and dark but still there is some hope dropped in there now and again. A lovely write :)

[drew garner]

i like the imagery and the playful complex use of fonts and color just wish i didn't feel they didn't suit the language. i enjoyed the poem and the technique just not sure if they fit together this time.

[Matt Lugg]

I feel this. I could see what you were doing with the change of font but I could have done without it.

[Wanaka]

I like how you made some of the Font different from the rest. It makes the reader go back and see if there is a bigger meaning behind it. Although you say this is an outline it can easily be on it's own. You did an amazing job.

[R.E. Ray]

This poem is packed with vivid imagery and certainly conveys pain, frustration, despair, and resentment, but also hope and self-redemption.

I appreciate your originality and artful expressions, though the alignment, different font sizes, styles, and colors were a bit distracting. I believe your art lies more in your words and phrases than how you format them in poem. But, it's just one man's opinion.

You're a gifted writer, and I encourage you to continue expressing your genuine self. Nice work.

[Coyote Poetry]

You did very well with this poem. I liked the drive and the energy of these words. The poem made the reader fall into the words and to want some more. Thank you for sharing the amazing words and thoughts.
Coyote

[Simone Davis]

I thought it was good but felt it would be better if it was a story...it feels like your using a lot of words which is good but feel it would make an amazing story if it had a bit more body in it... not sure what type of criticism you wanted. I think you would be amazing at writing stories I’m not being negative I agree with what the person below said just think it’s more story like xx

[Sachi Ruaya]

Thank you for your review! Much appreciated!
Any criticism. Anything that will diminish my hunger to find things to improve on. Actually, re-reading this, I do agree :)

SachikoMochiko

[AliceBarnes]

I can see why you struggled to write this because you really made it great. I enjoyed reading this very much, even though this is not my usual read I still found it interesting and it captivated my interest. As you said there are a few tweaks (minor ones) where the punctuation needs to be added to make this perfect, but these minor things did not impact the quality of the poem. I find it very interesting that you base your poems off of your true feelings or events that are taking place in your life - that is not just extremely brave but it is helping you to become a better poet and writer since you are putting yourself in the shoes of your characters and the narrators of the poems you write. Overall, I thought that this was beautifully crafted and I thoroughly enjoyed reading this. I look forward to reading more of your works in the future and thank you for sending my a read request as I really did enjoy this poem.