Mermaid cast upon the beach

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Artist: Frank Hopper.  This piece is entitled "Red Tide" and it has been copywrited by the artist.  Permission to use this inspiring piece of art with my poem is currently being sought from the artist.  The current image was obtained from tinypic.com at http://i51.tinypic.com/2rc6gp3.jpg. TinyPic® is a Photobucket Video & Photo Sharing Company.

 

 

Mermaid cast upon the beach

 

     “…tragedy in the wake of the storm…”

 

 

Most cruel and horrid storm

What damage have you wrought?

You raged the night and from the sea you tossed

The fairest form that e’er my eye did see

You’d think that God himself would cry

And spare this maid--grant bles'sed clemency!

 

Not common lot of fish

Should this fair maid abide!

Oh sea, have you no sense of shame or pride?

This beaut'ous form lies lifeless on the beach

And so I pray--it's nature I beseech:

Undo this deed--undo this foul breach!

 

But oh, with tears I now do fully see

No hallowed spirit nor nature's sprite will heed my plea

This heinous crime will stand without respite--

No godly pow’r will grant just amnesty

So naught is left to do but sigh--

No heav’n above to quell my anguished cries

 

And so, fair maid, then this ' thy final resting place!

And oh, this deed, this bitter world’s disgrace

In briny grave I place thy cold remains

Thy spirit free now of all mortal chains

And 'bout thy grave shells of the sea I'll place--

And fragrant flow'rs make mantle for thy face

 

‘Tis all that I can do for thee, sad maid--

‘Twas most ill fortune to have seen thee fade

 

 

 

©2010 Richard Puetter

All rights reserved

 

 

Notes

 

A tribute to Frank Hopper's magical piece of art: "Red Tide".

Reviews

[Abby L.]

Ok I enjoyed your poem, I like the fact that it was based off something. The picture bothers me a lot. I do not like nudity, and I really don't enjoy art with nudity or sex of any kind. But that's just me.
Your poem is simply fantastic. I can truly feel the anguish, in the words. I love how the emotions rise and fall, and you display that well.
A lot of people don't write like this anymore and I miss it. Free-styling is in fashion.
I hope you continue to write more! Great job!
::Abby::

[Brielle Cartny]

Beautiful! This reminds me of Chaucer's writings. The rhyming is just like his, along with the language.

[Wolfhilde]

this is an amazing piece of work! I love the painting. it is beautiful. You can find a lot of inspiration from paintings. Like your poem, which is as well very beautiful ofcourse!

It reminds me of a painting I really adore. It is a bit diffrent from this story you are telling, but it just reminded me.

http://www.artrenewal.org/pages/artwork.php?artworkid=32688&size=large

it is called: The Golden Rose from Donato Giancola.

Good work!

Wolfhilde

[Serenity Faith]

And what a lovely tribute it was indeed. The wording was perfectly suited for the fisherman who found the beautiful sea maiden. Superb ^_~

[Little Whisper]

This poem brought me such saddness for the mermaid thrown from the sea...You made her real and her tragic end truly mourned. Beautiful!

[David Lewis Paget]

I like this very much, but with reservations about the archaisms used. e.g. 'e'er', 'tis', 'twas', and the dropping of the vowels from 'beaut(e)ous', 'pow(e)r, 'heav(e)n, '(a)bout.' A nineteenth century contrivance, I think our readers can be trusted to gloss over the syllables you want to shorten, and it would improve the form for modern readers. Funnily enough, I too have my mermaid poem at
http://www.writerscafe.org/writing/Dawei/434134/
It's worth a look to compare how we each deal with a fascinating myth.

[Marie]

What a sad and beautiful poem. You captured the spirit of the picture perfectly.
Oh lovely ocean's angel
Lying on the sand
You must have angered Neptune
Who cast you to the land

[Relic]

Certainly an artistic endeavor is this piece. The images jump out and the classic spellings are superb and fit the age of the scene. The emotion left behind after reading is one of sorrow for a creature of the sea created from innocence and cast by fate into a raging storm that took her life. An excellent photo compliments this poem perfectly.

Well done.

[AK]

Beautiful poem! I loved the style and use of words. Your punctuation and flow is amazing! Great, great write!

[Rae]

This is an amazing use of rhyme, not at all like most I see from writers lacking experience. In my contests, I allow no rhyme because I get things only like "The fat cat fought a bat in a hat." and it just angers me. Rhyme is beautiful, but sometimes they can be covered in dust and mud. Metaphorically, you've just cleansed the art of rhyme in my mind. Thank you. :)
On another note, it's a wonderful piece all in all. I picture mostly everything I read in my head, like a mental movie. This was just beautiful. If it was a real movie, I would buy it the day it came to DVD and put it on my highest shelf. I loved it.

[Evita]

Instead of picturing a beautiful mermaid, I thought of the fiesta island whale as I read...I think it a fitting tribute to that awesome creature too! Beautiful!