Mermaid cast upon the beach

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Artist: Frank Hopper.  This piece is entitled "Red Tide" and it has been copywrited by the artist.  Permission to use this inspiring piece of art with my poem is currently being sought from the artist.  The current image was obtained from tinypic.com at http://i51.tinypic.com/2rc6gp3.jpg. TinyPic® is a Photobucket Video & Photo Sharing Company.

 

 

Mermaid cast upon the beach

 

     “…tragedy in the wake of the storm…”

 

 

Most cruel and horrid storm

What damage have you wrought?

You raged the night and from the sea you tossed

The fairest form that e’er my eye did see

You’d think that God himself would cry

And spare this maid--grant bles'sed clemency!

 

Not common lot of fish

Should this fair maid abide!

Oh sea, have you no sense of shame or pride?

This beaut'ous form lies lifeless on the beach

And so I pray--it's nature I beseech:

Undo this deed--undo this foul breach!

 

But oh, with tears I now do fully see

No hallowed spirit nor nature's sprite will heed my plea

This heinous crime will stand without respite--

No godly pow’r will grant just amnesty

So naught is left to do but sigh--

No heav’n above to quell my anguished cries

 

And so, fair maid, then this ' thy final resting place!

And oh, this deed, this bitter world’s disgrace

In briny grave I place thy cold remains

Thy spirit free now of all mortal chains

And 'bout thy grave shells of the sea I'll place--

And fragrant flow'rs make mantle for thy face

 

‘Tis all that I can do for thee, sad maid--

‘Twas most ill fortune to have seen thee fade

 

 

 

©2010 Richard Puetter

All rights reserved

 

 

Notes

 

A tribute to Frank Hopper's magical piece of art: "Red Tide".

Reviews

[Abby L.]

Ok I enjoyed your poem, I like the fact that it was based off something. The picture bothers me a lot. I do not like nudity, and I really don't enjoy art with nudity or sex of any kind. But that's just me.
Your poem is simply fantastic. I can truly feel the anguish, in the words. I love how the emotions rise and fall, and you display that well.
A lot of people don't write like this anymore and I miss it. Free-styling is in fashion.
I hope you continue to write more! Great job!
::Abby::

[Zahra]

A beautiful scene captured with lots of sentiments. Wonderfully used metaphor. Life like a storm sometimes shatters the beauty and innocence and the damage only those with a heart can see.

[WhiteWillow]

No point in dissecting this...its beautiful from top to bottom, an incredible feat of writing. Simply beautiful.

[Shelly]

Congrats on winning the Fabled Interests contest! Your submission was truely inspiring!

[Kuro]

Congratulations for winning the Write Me A Poem! contest!

I apologize for your wait for this review. I got caught up with school work, although I had every intention of commenting on your poem in a much more timely manner. Please forgive me for the delay.

Stories of mermaids have captivated me as long as I can remember, but as I've grown older, I've begun to lose touch with my love for the mythical and magical. Despite this, I was immediately interested in reading your poem when I saw the title. I hoped I would find something unique and inspiring to revive my imagination, and of course, I was not disappointed.

Your poem stands apart from anything I've ever read before, especially because of your masterful use of Old English style language. While the poem itself is an interesting concept, it's the Shakespearean monologue that truly makes it a work of art. Its old-time charm creates a beautiful rhythm, almost as if your poem carried its own whimsical- albeit tragic- tune.

In addition to the incredible writing, I must also say that the painting you used to compliment your piece was a brilliant choice. It's one thing to read words on a screen, but now your readers have a distinct image of this fair maid and her untimely demise, bringing a liveliness to the poem where words cannot.

Thank you for sharing your creation and participating in my contest. You are a superb writer, and it was truly a pleasure reading your work.

[Great Aunt Astri]

I love this 'traditional poem' format. Why some poets have a problem with old poems I don't know! You tell an imaginative story in a an imaginative way. Lovely.

[TrimarcoRansome]

This is a wonderful story, Mermaids are just such a charm and the entire mythology around them enchanting. Even through her earthly demise you brought this old tale back to life once more. I like the Old English twists too, it takes you imagination back to yesteryear's. Beautifully penned which flowed brilliantly. A joy to read.

[David Scott]

Thank you for sharing this vivid story Rick. I do love the idea of a mermaid...
Fate is not kind in this world. The laws of nature have been twisted and until balance is restored, mortals will suffer their mortality.
Oh how I long for the immortal days...
But that is another story I fear. Ha
Ancient tone with a salty realism brings this fable to life!
Great poem.

[Mary]

Amazing! Painting and poem. The style you use to write this poem is perfect! The shock and dismay and sadness of the fisherman upon his discovery of the mermaid. Just beautiful!