The Ne'er King

What is Man without purpose? -- To my Father

License: Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported. Author: Hgrobe. The original image has been modified. The original can be seen at http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/5/55/Senufo-mask_hg.jpg

 

 

 

The Ne’er King

 

        Not just about Kings...

 

Ne'er from legends of past sorrows,

Find we deeds that song may borrow

No righted wrongs of yesterday

Or how the Ne'er King loved or slayed

 

Most meager, He, among the meek

And when He died no tear wet cheek

No dauntless gaze came from His eyes

Ne'er hint of danger shook His thighs

 

His name not set in memory

Not history, nor family!

Ne'er were His deeds set down in books

And from His rage no monster shook

 

Ne'er fought He fiend in fetid fen

Or poured He passion from His pen

Ne'er He for honor or for fame

Lifted sword, His heart in flame

 

He had sweet breath and winning looks

But for hard works no time He took

His soul held naught but poverty

Ne'er in His name was majesty

 

Oh think, what purpose His life filled?

No victory sought, no dragon killed

Had He no course or any plan?

Then He ne'er King, ne'er He a man.

 

 

©2009, Richard Puetter

All rights reserved

Author's Note

I am especially indebted to my friends Legion and Mark for pointing out the weakness in the last stanza of prior versions of this poem. Initially I disagreed with your assessment, but after due consideration I could only admit that you both were right. The new ending is very much stronger and I have both of you to thank for pushing me in this direction. Thanks, my friends!

Additional thanks go to Meredith Greene for helping me tone down the number of occurances of "ne'er" in the piece. Ne'er it be said I don't listen to my critics and follow their suggestions especially when they are so on the mark. Thanks, Meredith.

Reviews

[Legion]

I like this piece, but I think the last stanza really needs some work. Doesn't seem to really fit with the rest of the piece. Also, fix the last line of the second stanza. Should be "his" not "this". Reminds me a bit of "Ozymandius" by Percy Byce Shelley.

As for what is man without purpose? Ne'er much more than a monkey without meaning.

[Mark]

Love the new stanza, Rick! Alliteration is one of my favorite tools, you'll find it in a lot of my stuff! Great add!

[Fran Marie]

His name ne'er set in memory
Ne'er history, ne'er family!
Ne'er were His deeds set down in books
And from His rage ne'er monster shook

It reads perfect to me,I especially like the above verse

how can one remember a passive man such as this?
without life's plan who took no risks
nor made his mark 'pon god's good land
ne'er a king, where ne'er a man

Sorry 'bout that you inspire a response of my thoughts~great Piece Rick!

[Sheila Kline]

Your piece, as always resounds with literary genius, therefore I am attempting to discern your meaning as I know it is "right on" with meter, and poetic form....for that is you.

Now as to the meaning -

The king is a king by title, but he has never performed or achieved that which may be deemed out of the ordinary.

In fact, It seems as if he has performed his duties with such lack of passion and insignificant value that it is questioned if he was really worthy to be called King....hence the title.

We may go through life as did the king, and not achieve anything more than is necessary, fail to rise above problems, or look for ways to work through problems.

You have a wonderful message in your poem that certainly does speak to me as life presents challenges. How do we handle them? Each of us must make choices! Shall we be as the Ne'er King and give up..... or rise above a situation and become worthy to be praised by producing results "fit for a King".

A stunning write!

[Lizanne]

The man of never. A life that went nowhere due to his never having put forth the effort to accomplish something. Great writing all around. A piece that reads like true poetry should. Magnificent work of word artistry.

[Mark]

Rick, this writing has gone through several manifestations, and bruthah, you have nailed it! I like the new stanza very much, it really makes the futility, the pointlessness of his life really pop, as well as the vanity (in the Ecclesiastes sense) that was his primary life-force.

[emmajoy]

Strange but .. from start to finish I heard a man's voice as if part tribute, part parchmented letter of regret. There seem to be conflicting thoughts in the intent or delivery of such a person.

You always write with power, even though cushioned in a velvet glove; you always present a picture of words, plus - importantly, this ignoramus learns what true writing skill is all about.

' He had sweet breath and winning looks But for hard works ne'er time He took His life now lost in mystery Ne're in His name was majesty '

[Anthony M Smith Jr]

Awesome! From start to finish I had enjoyed the words and have to admit I used reference books for meanings to some of the words and that made it even better, for me! Thanks for sharing your talent of story telling. Could imagine myself siting around and campfire and listening and letting my mind travel along with the words of a Ne 'er King.
TT-TTO-NI-K
Elk

[Ellen Hammond]

I think I just stepped through a time warp. LOL I like your style, your rhyme and flow almost as much as the message in this poem. Very thought provoking and indeed we all need purpose to our lives.