Odysseus

the consequence of pride

Greek ruins on the island of Aegina

 

 

 

Voice of Queen Arete¹:

 

Oh, sing of king Odysseus,

thought cunning and most wise,

but through his prideful failings

his wisdom was belied!

 

In Ithaca he had a wife,

a son and a bright throne.

His duty drove him off to war²,

but pride kept him from home.

 

     Chorus:

 

     Oh, prideful Odysseus,

     why goad Poseidon’s son? ³

     Back to Telemachus⁴―

     the better course to run!

 

               * * *

 

Voice of the sailor Elepnor⁵:

 

The war in Troy was nearly won,

brave Hector⁶ now was dead.

The war had waged on ten long years―

when thought comes to your head.

 

A clever ploy could win the day,

An off'ring made of wood.

Your gift was taken through the gates

and in brave Troy now stood.

 

     Chorus:

 

     Oh, cunning Odysseus,

     why make the Trojan horse?

     End all the battles―

     Now homeward set thy course!

 

Now toss your ships on the high seas,

Poseidon’s rage your shame⁷.

Raise prayer to god Athene;

may her graces ease your pain!⁸

 

To magic isle you sail your ship.

Your men are turned to swine⁹.

With Hermes’ drug¹⁰ the spell is stayed,

and you o’erstay your time.

 

     Chorus:

 

     Oh, lustful Odysseus,

     why lie in Circe’s bed? ¹¹

     Back to Penelope¹²―

     for she’s the love you wed!

 

Returning now to Ithaca,

a beggar you appear,

but faithful dog cannot be fooled,

so, too, the old housekeeper¹³.

 

And now most hateful Antinous¹⁴

your mind you set to kill.

Telemachus and Eumaeus¹⁵,

will complement your skill.

 

     Chorus:

 

     Oh, vengeful Odysseus,

     why string you now your bow? ¹⁶

     Kill all the suitors―

     lest they reap what you did sow! ¹⁷

 

And so, most sad Odysseus,

you lost near half your life.

Consulting with Tiresias¹⁸

did not foresee this strife!

 

Your wisdom and your cunning,

your prowess and your skill,

and bounteous aid from the gods

could not trump prideful will.

 

     Chorus:

 

     Oh, willful Odysseus,

     could you not learn from this?

     Waste all your youth―

     your loved ones barred from bliss!

 

               * * *

 

Voice of King Alcinous¹⁹:

 

And thus, in seeking answers,

what can we take away?

We see that pride

that goes untamed

puts life in disarray.

 

And even with great knowing,

with wisdom and great skill,

the best laid plots

will turn to naught―

pride always portents ill.

 

 

©2008 Richard Puetter

All rights reserved

 

 

Notes

 

^[1]The Odyssey begins with Odysseus relating his story up to the point at which he arrives in Phaeacia to the Phaeacian king and queen, Alcinous and Arete. He had just spent seven years with Calypso, before leaving her island and coming to Phaeacia. So it is quite natural that Alcinous and Arete would deliver the moral lesson to Odysseus’ tale, having heard most of the details of his journey.

 

^[2]Odysseus followed king Agamemnon, the leader of the Greek armies, to the war against Troy.

 

^[3]Odysseus blinded the cyclops Polyphemus, the son of Poseidon. As Odysseus and his men left the island of the Cyclops, Odysseus called back telling him boastfully of his true name. Polyphemus then told his father that it was Odysseus that blinded him, and this is the root of Odysseus’ torturous ten year journey back to Ithaca.

 

^[4]Telemachus is Odysseus’ son and was an infant at the time Odysseus left for the war against Troy.

 

^[5]Elepnor is a young seaman in Odysseus’ crew who dies on Circe’s island and whose spirit reproaches Odysseus in Hades when Odysseus goes there to get advice from Tiresias"see note [18]. As part of Odysseus’ crew, he has first-hand knowledge of many of the details of the Odyssey.

 

^[6]Hector was the oldest son of Priam, the king of Troy, and is arguably the best warrior overall in the Trojan wars. With the aid of the gods, he was killed by Achilles and his body dragged around the city of Troy.

 

^[7]All of Odysseus’ men die because of the blinding and prideful goading of Polyphemus.

 

^[8]The goddess Athene was Odysseus’ benefactor and constantly interceded on his behalf with the gods.

 

^[9]After leaving the land of the cannibals, Odysseus and his one remaining ship reach the isle of Aeaea, where Circe, the enchantress, lives. Through the feeding of magical cheese and wine, Circe turns half of Odysseus’ men into pigs.

 

^[10]Hermes gave Odysseus an herb called moly (now thought by some to be the herb “snowdrop”) to escape Circe’s magic.

 

^[11]Once Circe discovers she cannot defeat Odysseus, she falls in love with him, taking him as a lover for a period of one year, at which time Odysseus’ men finally convince him to begin again on his journey back to Ithaca.

 

^[12]Penelope is Odysseus’ wife who waited faithfully twenty years for his return from the Trojan wars. Since Odysseus did not return quickly after the wars, many presumed him dead, and so a large group of suitors for Penelope’s hand gathered at the house of Odysseus, squandering his goods. The evil suitors even plotted against Telemachus’ life as he was seen as an obstacle to obtaining Odysseus’ kingdom.

 

^[13]On Odysseus’ final return to Ithaca, he disguises himself as a beggar, but this disguise cannot hide his true identity from his faithful dog, Argus, and the old housekeeper and Odysseus’ nurse, Eurycleia, who recognizes the boar-hunting scar on Odysseus’ leg when she washes his feet.

 

^[14]Antinous is the leader of the suitors and is the first one slain by Odysseus. He is a cruel, greedy, and hypocritical villain that justifies his evil by distorting the motives and acts of others.

 

^[15]Eumaeus is the faithful, chief swineherd of Odysseus who helps him on his return. He, Telemachus, and Athene help Odysseus kill all of the suitors.

 

^[16]Prompted by Odysseus’ suggestion, Penelope finally proposes a final archery contest to the suitors where the winner will have her hand in marriage. The contest is to be performed with Odysseus’ bow, and only Odysseus is strong enough to string the bow. After stringing the bow and winning the contest, Odysseus kills all of the suitors.

 

^[17]While the suitors are clearly evil, Odysseus must take some responsibility for their actions, because his long absence, which ultimately can be traced to his pride, resulted in the situation in the first place.

 

^[18]Before leaving the island of Circe, she tells Odysseus that he must travel to Hades to consult Tiresias for instructions on how to return to Ithaca. Tiresias is the most famous of Grecian seers. While Tiresias is blind, in compensation for this blindness the gods granted him unparalleled visionary powers.

 

^[19]Alcinous, king of the Phaeacians--see note [1].

Reviews

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

I really enjoyed reading your notes, so much to know and learn..
As for the poem, such an epic I like the telling of Odysseus 'adventures'..
Seems he was a ladies man .. Penelope an angel waiting for him..
This is so interesting .. like a song you have a chorus echoing the wrongs of
Odysseus ..which were many- wonderful to look upon and read,, thank you!

[Roger Ferguson II]

you really know your stuff. this was a great poem, the flow was perfect and it told the story well. i like that you have notes too.

[The Tea Party Mouse.]

Oh wow! I love Greek mythology and found this very entertaining.

[Nancy Lee Shrader]

Congrats on you great winning poem!

[Salvatore Buttaci]

Congratulations for winning the shadows contest!

[Max]

These are the stanza's i found a bit awkward:

"A clever ploy could win the day,
An offering made of wood.
Your gift was taken through the gates
and in brave Troy now stood."

"Now toss your ships on the high seas,
Poseidon's rage your shame.
Raise prayer to god Athene;
may her graces ease your pain!"

I had to stop and reread them because you have to read a line or two differently than you would regularly, and that makes it a little bit awkward, particularly the 2nd and last line of the first of the stanzas.

but it's good overall, and if you read it with a certain inflection, or just in regular iambic meter, it makes more sense.

Maybe i'd change "offering" to "off'ring", leving out a sylable. it sounds better.

[Max]

wow. You are offiicially my favorite internet poet XD.

but seriously. Very unique, and, despite the few awkward phrases i stumbled upon (which saddens me a bit, yourself being a master of meter), it is absolutely great!

You need to publish your poetry in a book, then send me a signed copy XD.

[SJ Roebling]

Once again you leave you awestruck with your work. You bring the reader into your world. When I read you, it is as if you have lived a thousand years, and more.
"And even with great knowing,with wisdom and great skill,the best laid plotswill turn to naught―pride always portents ill." Bloody brilliant!

[C.T. Bailey]

Rick, a superlative re-telling. I enjoyed the piece completely, but most appreciated were the insertions of character traits in the first line of each of the chorus rounds. I like how you have built a case for the closing thoughts and underlying theme. You build your statements and support each one with excellent clarity and descriptive thought. I have nothing to say from a usage or grammatical point of view. However, I re-read several times and noted a few instances where you meter deviated. While in the purest form of quatrain poetry, the issue with meter would not be worth noting, however; in trying to create something of profound lyrical quality, I think (as a personal opinion) that you probably want to be dead on with the iambic meter. Here are some places I noted with suggestions for the same:

1) The war in Troy was nearly won,
brave Hector now was dead.
The war had waged ten long years― (removed "on")
when thought comes to your head.

2) A clever ploy could win the day,
An offering made of wood.
Your gift was taken through the gates
and in brave Troy now it stood. (added "it)

3) Oh, cunning Odysseus,
why make the Trojan horse?
Take your leave from the battles― (added "take your leave") The meter in this chorus was off the most
Now homeward set thy course!

4) Toss your ships upon the seas, (Added "upon" and cut "Now" & "seas" {I dont like to use now})
Poseidon's rage your shame.
Raise prayer to god Athene;
may her graces ease your pain!

5) Oh, willful Odysseus,
could you not learn from this? (added "could")
Wasting all of your youth― (Changed to "wasting")
your loved ones barred from bliss!

This is a great piece. I have come to expect this caliper of writing from you. A master of astoral physics indeed, but a master craftsman and wordsmith of verse...Rick...here lies your peace and introspect. Thank you for your patience in waiting for my review sir.
your friend,
Todd