Prodigal Child

You painted my portrait before I was known

And from the dust you formed my bones.

You watched as I sang and danced in the breeze,

And I smiled because You danced with me,

But time has stolen my spirit's freedom.

I no longer waltz to Your creation's rhythm.

My soul wilted in the winter and my eyes turned grey;

Though You longed for my love, I slowly turned away.

On days like these, I wish that I'd return,

Yet I remain a prodigal daughter. For now, my soul shall burn.

Your creation has consumed me in a way I never knew;

I find myself a proponent of things I swore I'd never do.

I hope one day Your light will find me again,

Even though I know that I can't wait 'til then.

My dichotomous desire for the Son and the moon

Have left me diseased, but I understand I won't heal soon.

Later on in life or death, we will resume our dance

It is then and only then, that I'll be whole again.

Reviews

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

You are never forgotten or removed- we are only as far away as we allow ourselves to be as we move closer so the spirit comes closer- it’s up to us the choices we make we are not our past we are what we choose to be now and if we live in our will or His will🌹moving words and thoughts🌹

[Rosie Brooklin]

I'm slowly returning to where I need to be. Thank you!

[‘Thoughts In Time’🌹]

All in due time- we learn as we return🌹

[Re-Pete]

very deep and relatable. we all struggle. remember - the prodigal son was welcomed back with open arms and a celebration with the finest things in honor. i was lost but now i am found. great stuff - powerfully told. i like this a lot ... :)

[Perdition]

I will always tell you my truth and I hope it helps but always follow your own path. For me, the rhyming scheme went out once Whitman wrote his Leaves of Grass, changing everything, and returned here and there with several amazing poets but poetry evolved and one of the most hindering aspects in contemporary poetry, though you rarely find it anymore as you do in song writing, is the meter and rhyme. There are some outstanding thoughts and lines in this poetry and I can't help but wonder where your mind would venture without those chains. Setting the horses free so to speak. I enjoyed this emotionally...as I rarely go into the content when rhyme schemes are involved because it simply overwhelms the poetry (again my taste), but this is just so emotionally rich, and I was deeply involved and touched which is quite the amazing feat. Finally your poetry is yours as it is your expression so I hope you take this without offense understanding that is simply my preference. A pleasure to meet you btw and thank you for the read. Wonderful, wonderful lines.

[Rosie Brooklin]

Thank you for your honest review! I really appreciate it and I understand where you're coming from, completely. I have written other works without the rhyming scheme. I think you might like those more.

[Perdition]

You're most welcome and looking forward to reading them.

[Richard simpson]

This poem has a good rhythm and beat to it; I love the rhyme scheme and the way the poem just moves you from emotion to distant emotion. It needs more presence of human soul into it. Put the world as your compass and sail into more distant horizons. By that, I mean, take your poems to new degrees of experimentation. Whenever I write a poem or free verse song, I tend to write my emotions, my fears, and my triumphs all wrapped in one package. I'm sorry if I made you upset or feel lost. It's just my opinion and I still love your work. Good effort.

[Nipplegrinder]

Despite the way you present this piece, there is abundant beauty in these words.

[Coyote Poetry]

A parent love is never forgotten. They may be disappointed. I liked the honest words and thoughts in the poetry. Thank you Rosie for sharing the excellent poetry.
Coyote

[barleygirl]

This is a brilliantly written poem of twisted feelings, mostly sadness & loss, with a sprinkling of hope. Your message itself isn’t what grabbed me, it’s the way your writing gave off such strong feelings, literally tugging at my heart. There have been many estrangements between mothers & daughters in my huge family, including my own current estrangement with my mom who’s 96 (I’m 61 & youngest of 9 kids). The way you describe the longing/repulsion as a constant force, pulling & pushing, wrenching any possible feelings that try to grow & heal this divide . . . that sensation is so amazing, it exceeds the actual storyline told in your words. I believe we are always drawn to our parents/children even when we are in a spot where there’s no question the estrangement will continue. There’s a ton of imagination & truth here (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Rosie Brooklin]

Thank you so much for your kind review! I try to be as open as I can. Hugs

[KWP]

Great write - I think in this day and age this happens a lot with kids - parents forget that their childs life is their own - set the bird free and they will learn to fly.

[sette]

this is one amazing poem...

[Rosie Brooklin]

Thank you!

[KCthelastboyscout]

Emotionally powerful. somewhere inside of you darkness met light and created something beautiful

[Rosie Brooklin]

Thank you so much!