chapter 9 secrets

Chapter 9: Secrets

I woke up that morning with fresh thoughts. It was Monday and I wouldn’t have to see him again… hopefully. Why would he follow me to school and he wouldn’t dare follow me home… After eating a bowl of cereal, washing up, and changing I left for school. Laura was waiting in silence by our normal spot. Neither of us wanted to say anything but it was good to keep the company. We sat down and I put my headphones in and drowned out the world till she tapped me on the shoulder and told me the bell had rung. Classes went by in the haze of boring in its normal pattern. Laura and I didn’t say much to each other because we didn’t have many classes together, only one, and we kept quiet during those times when we met between classes.

When I got home I was exhausted. I got the mail and looked through it for my stuff. I had two college postcards and a letter from my brother. Dad left a message on the machine saying he’d be gone until about eight. I made dinner and read the letter. Luke talked about how much he missed me and how he was doing fine. That was the gist of it. I put it in my room with the rest of the letters he sent me. I went down stairs and made dinner for myself. I started my physics homework and settled in for a long night. Dad did come home at eight but went straight to bed. I went up to my room at eleven and continued work at my desk. Just as I got settled I heard a slight tap coming from the window. I froze for a minute but passed it off as some bird of a random acorn. Then it happened again. I stood up to look after the third strike. Sure enough he was waiting patiently looking up at the window. I sighed but opened it.

“What do you want?” I hissed as quietly.

“I wanted to talk to you,” he shouted.

“Shhhhhh!” I hissed with my finger over my mouth, “You’ll wake my dad.”

“Oh right,” he chuckled, “sorry.”

“I’ll agree with you there, now what do you want?”

“I said I need to talk to you,” he sighed, “I know that what you saw was bad but I have my reasons.”

“Oh you do, do you?” I whispered harshly.

“Yeah and if you’ll just let me explain…”

“No!” I hissed, “Look I still have a lot of homework and then I have to study for the test I don’t have time for you to explain something that shouldn’t have happened.”

“You don’t seem like the kind of person to leave that to last minute,” he grinned.

“Goodnight Will,” I sighed while going to close the window again.

“Wait! Can we talk tomorrow?” he pleaded.

“I don’t know,” I said thoughtfully.

“Please?” he whined, “I promise I’ll leave you alone tonight?”

“Fine…” I sighed, “I guess as long as you let me work tonight maybe we’ll talk tomorrow.”

“Maybe?” he asked confused.

“Yes maybe, you creeper, goodnight,” I hissed and slammed the window shut.

“What was that,” my father yawned groggily as he opened my door a crack.

“Nothing, there was a bug outside my window that was annoying me,” I said, trying to control the anger in my voice.

“Oh,” he sighed, “Why are you still up?”

“Physics,” I whispered.

“I thought you had that handled?” he said in outrage.

“Yes but I’m studying, we have a test tomorrow and I’m not quite ready.”

“Well you need to sleep or else you won’t do well no matter how hard you study.”

“I know, I just need a while longer.”

“Alright sweety, goodnight,” he yawned and left, “No more leaving it up to the last minute!” he shouted through the door.

“Yes papa,” I yawned. I went back to work and ended up staying up till two in the morning when I passed out on the bed.

Classes the next day went much the same. That is until I left. I had stayed late to finish my physics test so when I went to my car the parking lot was deserted. I put my clothes on top of my car and fished in my purse for my keys when suddenly there was a hand around my wrist. I closed my eyes and began to panic.

“I’m not going to hurt you,” I heard Will whisper.

“What are you my stalker,” I snapped.

“You said we would talk.” He pulled me closer.

“I… I meant later, like when no one’s around,” I whispered.

“No one is around.”

“Somewhere more private.”

“Let me just explain.”

“I will, just not like this.” I started to tug but he wouldn’t let me go. Panic filled my mind as I tried everything just to make him let me go. it seemed he expected all my moves, amateur though they were, and blocked them.

“Let’s just go back to… to the bookstore and I’ll tell you everything.” He started taking me towards his car.

“NO! Let me go!” I kept squirming. Suddenly his grip left my arms and I heard a sickening thud. I turned around to watch George falling backwards clutching his nose with both hands. Will and I froze. I was in shock, I’m not sure why he stopped. Right before I plucked up the courage to scream Will turned and put a finger to my lips.

“I’m sorry, so sorry,” was all he muttered before he ran to his car and drove away.

“George!” I screamed as I ran to him and fell to my knees. “What’s wrong?”

“He punched me!” George screamed in outrage. “What the hell was that?” he said pitifully as his eyes watered up.

“Oh no, oh no, what do I do, what do I do?” I said in panic and hysteria. I clasped my own hands to my head as he tried to get up.

“No, I think I’ll be fine,” he whimpered.

“I think your nose is broken,” I whispered as he lowered his hands. There was a lot of blood and his nose was crooked.

“I’ll be fine,” he whimpered again.

“No, come on, my dad’s a doctor,” I said soothingly pulling him up and walking him towards my car, “he’ll know what to do.”

“Thanks,” he sighed as I set him in the passenger seat, “I guess… who was that guy?”

“I don’t know,” I whispered as I got in the driver’s seat and started the car.

“Are you going to tell me anything else,” he muttered.

“It’s… embracing… I’d rather not,” I whispered. We didn’t say anything after that and it turned into a long drive as we hit all the red lights. I watched in horror as his nose swelled by the second; his eye was starting to swell.

“He got you good didn’t he,” I muttered as I helped him out of the car.

“Yeah, he certainly knew what he was doing.”

“That’s what scares me,” I whispered.

“I don’t think you should see him anymore,” he said emotionlessly.

“I don’t plan on it.” My dad was very worried but took care of him quickly. It wasn’t long before he asked for an explanation.

“Alright what happened?” he sighed as he shut the door, leaving him in a room with us in the crowded hall way.

“We got caught in the deserted parking lot,” I muttered.

“Did you see who it was?” he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“I… I didn’t… I didn’t know who… he was,” I whispered looking at the ground. Technically I didn’t lie. I didn’t know who Will was back there.

“Well… alright tell me what happened.”

“I was going for my car when this guy… he came up to me and grabbed my arms. Next thing I knew George was knocked out and the guy was gone.”

“So this guy, threatened you?” he hissed.

“Dad, don’t worry about it. I’m sure it won’t happen again,” I sighed.

“Well most people are sure it wouldn’t happen in the first place but here we are. If it weren’t for George you could be… I don’t even want to think what could have happened,” he said frustrated, waving his arms around and grabbing my arms at the end. The look in his eyes was desperate. I couldn’t take the intensity so I looked at the ground.

“I know but I’m sure…”

“You can never be sure of anything,” he whispered.

“Well, what do you want me to do?”

“Be more careful, don’t go out when you’re alone,” he whispered urgently.

“Well how will that help?”

“Start calling me more often.”

“I will call you when I’m out of school and when I get home and when I leave and… I don’t know when else.”

“That’s better,” he sighed. He let go of my arms but I could still see the fear in his eyes. “I can’t lose you,” he sighed as he walked away.

“I’m going to check on George and then head home!” I shouted.

“Alright honey! Love you!” he shouted as he checked some paper work at a desk. “I’ll not be home till eight again!” he shouted.

“Love you too,” I sighed as I entered George’s room.

“Hey,” he chuckled.

“Hey,” I sighed as I came to stand by his bed. He was just sitting.

“So the doc says I can just go home,” he smiled.

“Would you like a ride back to the school?” I offered.

“That would be… that would be really nice,” he whispered as a huge grin spread across his face.

“You look kind of rough there,” I said shyly as my smile faded.

“Well, it sure hurts like hell,” he grinned some more and then flinched.

“Oh, sorry, so I guess you broke your nose?” I flinched pointing at the brace on his nose.

“Yeah, I’m gona have a black eye too,” he grimaced. I saw the black forming around his eye and the bag of ice in his hand.

“I am soo sorry,” I pleaded, “I had no idea… he just follows me and… I don’t know what he wants!” I was starting to panic.

“Hey, it’s ok,” he put his hand on my shoulder and told me comfortingly.

“No, it’s not,” I was starting to tear up, “I’ve led him on and now he thinks it’s fine to… he thinks he can bother me whenever he likes!” I was now in outrage. “I have to… I have to tell him to leave me alone! I promised I’d talk to him but after that, after this,” I sighed sitting next to him and motioning towards his eye.

“I said it’s ok but you really need to get that guy to leave you alone,” he whispered putting his arm around my shoulders, “if you ever need me… if he comes again… you’ve got to call the cops.”

“Yeah…” I sighed.

“I have to wait for my mother but… after she gets here… can I get that ride?”

“Are you sure she wouldn’t mind?” I smiled unsurely.

“Well, I am seventeen… I’m almost an adult, she can’t tell me what to do,” he smiled back.

“Great,” I sighed and looked out the window. When his mother came to pay she told us that his father had gone for the car. He was rather disappointed. I gave him a kind smile and left him at the front desk

 I got home and passed out immediately after staying up all last night. From what I could tell dad never made it home. I woke up at ten. There was more tapping at my window. With a growl I jumped out of bed and opened my window ferociously.

“What do you want?” I yelled angrily.

“You,” he sighed looking down at the ground.

“How dare you!” I seethed, “You just punched my friend.”

“I didn’t mean to…”

“Oh, so what were you trying to do?” I sighed angrily.

“I… well when someone grabs me like that it’s my reflex to turn and hit.”

“So why is that the reflex?” I asked.

“I… well you saw what happened in the ally I... sometimes I get into trouble and I can’t… there’s no other way out,” he sighed.

“So why do you get into situations like that?”

“Because… look… I’ve done some things…” he sighed, “I’m not proud of… most of it is behind me but some things… last forever…”

“What things have you done?” I asked, a little scared of what he might say.

“I need you… I need to talk to you on the same level,” he whispered.

“Right so you can rape me,” I whispered sarcastically.

“I heard that!” he said angrily, “I will not rape you.”

“Hm, that’s funny because you also said you’d never hurt me,” I smirked.

“I never did!” he shouted in outrage.

“You hurt George and that hurt me, besides all that grabbing my arm ended with bruises,” I smirked.

“I didn’t grip you that hard,” he muttered, looking shamefully at the ground.

“Yeah, you did,” I huffed.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered hoarsely.

“Thanks,” I hissed.

“Look, is there anything I can… do for you that will… so I can explain?” he begged.

“Why?”

“Please?” he begged. I didn’t care until I noticed he had fallen to his knees.

“Give me one good reason I should even… still be talking to you?” I spit.

“Because…” he whimpered, “because I felt something… when I’m with you I feel… I feel… alive.” I hate to say it but he caught my attention… he caught my heart. “I just know that… that we were special… that we could be so much more!”

“You… you punched my friend!” I shouted.

“I know and I was an idiot! I can’t tell you why I was just taken by surprise I just wanted to… to protect you.”

“From what?” I seethed.

“I just… I needed to tell you… I needed you not to be mad at me…” he sighed.

“Just go away,” I cried. The tears starting to fall as I slammed the window shut and went back to bed.

The next day was as long as the previous two with the added awkwardness of lunch with George with his nose brace and black eye. It had gotten much worse but he assured me the pain meds were taking care of it. He was proud to tell me he’d told all his friends he had defended me from some stalker and they were all very impressed. I was happy for him. Today I made sure to get out of school as soon as possible even though I hate going through all that traffic. I called dad just as many times as he had told me to. When I got home I was filled with aggravation over what was happening with me and Laura and whether or not he would show up again tonight. Dad took today off most weeks but there were apparently a lot of emergencies he had to be there to handle. I ate dinner alone again and finished my homework quickly and went to bed watching TV. I was struck with fear as I heard a noise outside my window. It wasn’t rocks against glass again. I was really worried how thin the glass in my window was when I realized it was music.

“My Lily,” I opened the window and the singing hit me. “My beautiful Lily, sweeter than the sweetest flower…” he strummed the guitar lazily. “How I wish she would come down and speak to me!” his voice cracked. “Hello!” he shouted lazily, looking up at me while leaning on the wall below me.

“Are you drunk?” I shouted.

“I don’t know,” he whispered.

“How do you not know?” I sighed.

“Please let me talk to you,” he whimpered.

“Go away,” I snapped and slammed the window down.

“Beautiful eyes of blue and green, long brown hair, like a river of chocolate,” he grinned, “so beautiful… how sweet she knows just how to please me… no she knows… no she doesn’t know how much I love her… she doesn’t know how beautiful she really is…” it went silent before he started to lazily drone on and on about the same things. It was midnight before I gave in.

“Would you shut up! I’m trying to sleep!” I popped the window open and hissed.

“Not until you talk to me,” he sighed desperately.

“Fine,” I sighed clenching my eyes.

“Really?” he said in surprise.

“Yes, come back when you’re not drunk!” I shouted.

“But you promised the other day!” he whined.

“Well you punched my friend the other day,” I sighed.

“Why not now?” he pleaded.

“Because I don’t want you to pass out on me!” I whined.

“I need to talk… to you,” he whimpered.

“When you’re not drunk,” I sighed and then slammed the door. I tried to go back to sleep but his music began to drift back up to me. I tried putting my pillow over my head and then pulling the sheets over my head but nothing drowned out just the thought of him. With a sigh I pulled myself out of bed and ran down the stairs. I ripped open the door and ran around to the side of the house where he was seated under my window with guitar in his lap.

“What are you…” he started in surprise but I didn’t let him finish. I fell to my feet and planted my lips on his. After so long apart to be with him like this was like fireworks in my brain. Gone was the electricity replaced with explosions of light. His hand held my head closer to him and my arms wrapped around his shoulders. The guitar was getting in my way but it wouldn’t move when I tried to pull it away. I broke free for breath but he wasn’t finished. His kissed trailed down my neck as he let go of the guitar and got up on his knees. His hands cupped my butt and fear ran through my mind.

“Oh Lily,” he moaned, “I knew, I knew we were meant…”

“Stop!” I screamed to which he let me go quickly.

“I’m sorry but you just, you just were there and I couldn’t stop myself and I…”

“Shut up!” I sighed sinking down beside him.

“No really I’m so sorry for everything with George and at Charley’s I…”

“Look we will talk… just not right now… Will you’re drunk I can’t… not while you’re drunk ok,” I whimpered. He gave me a sad face and fell a little. “I promise we will talk but you’ve got to let me sleep,” I begged.

“Fine, when can we, when can we talk?”

“Look, we’ll talk… we’ll talk Friday at our place,” I sighed, “at the bookstore where we met.”

“Fine,” he sighed.

“Sleep,” I whispered as I kissed his closed eyes.

“I will, when you tell me you love me,” he giggled as he brushed my cheek.

“Why don’t you tell me first,” I whispered.

“I love you,” he whimpered.

“I love you too,” I whispered breathlessly.

“Thank you,” he sighed.

“Ok, sleep but just not here,” I huffed as I straggled to push him up.

“Alright love, I’ll go but you promised I could tell you everything,” he yawned as he stood up.

“Yes I did, come on, let’s get you going,” I sighed. I froze when I realized I had no clue how he got here or even where he would go.

“I walked,” he sighed, “That’s why it takes me so long.”

“Where do you live?”

“Downtown,” he sighed.

“Oh wow,” I gasped.

“Yeah,” he sighed.

“Well… I guess… go! Just go, just keep walking,” I shouted.

“Alright,” he sighed and started walking and then he started strumming his guitar and singing again.

“Would you stop that!” I shouted.

“Never!” he giggled loudly.

“Shut up,” I giggled slightly.

I went back to bed immediately. There were no thoughts of Laura or Will only the darkness of my subconscious. I woke up late the next morning and had to rush to school so as not to be late. Thursday ran just as fast as the other days. He didn’t come that night. Friday dragged out as I thought about what might happen that night. When I left school I thought about whether I should go directly to the store but decided to go home and change into something a little more comfortable. I called dad to let him know where I was going and left. Summoning my courage I turned off the car and walked in. I didn’t see him so I went to sit in the café. I sat for a minute and then pulled out a book to read.

“Hello,” I heard him whisper as he sat down in front of me. I barely moved my book down an inch but glared at him over the edge.

“I don’t know why I’m giving you this chance,” I whispered returning my gaze to the text.

“I know… it’s been hard… lately…” he sighed.

“Yeah, with all the fighting going on,” I muttered.

“Listen… I made a couple of mistakes as a kid,” he sighed, “mistakes that have messed up my entire future.”

“I thought that was what this was about,” I sighed.

“Yes well, I can’t just tell you everything right now… I can but I don’t think in the middle of all these people would be such a wise idea,” he smirked.

“How dare you,” I hissed.

“What?” he said innocently.

“You try to blow it off even after I gave you this chance.”

“Well what do you want from me,” he said frustrated.

“I want you to tell me,” I breathed.

“Then, would you come with me somewhere more private?”

“I guess,” I muttered. I closed the book and put it away. He stood up and tried to help me to my feet but I stood up and walked around his hand. I got to the door and then let him lead to his car.

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[Melody]

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