Wordless Words

I swear you’re not real.

 

Like grinding knuckles against shingles, blood to dust,

Cigarette and shingle dust lungs cough until the chest bruises,

Weary eyes and paycheck palms dangle in nothing,

 

Without her.

 

It’s sleepless nights, raccoon eyes, cumless sheets, cutlass spine,

Coarse hands, filthy face, unkempt nails, filed prints,

Chinless beard, earless head, budless tongue, bagged tears,

Careless lungs, continual roads, plaster prayers, splintered mirrors

 

Routine sadness,     

                                , Decayed madness

 

An empty glass, can’t put it down, can’t fill it up

 

Gone, gone, gone

 

Nothing is all is left, nothing is all I show,

Everything is buried as I wish I was as well.

Reviews

[Mark]

Although blank verse is not my personal favorite, I was struck by the forceful tactic of repeating the "-less" adjectives. That approach unified the piece, as many such are not. Then the "sadness" and "madness", which MIGHT have been intentional rhymes--I choose to think they were!--and your blank verse has suddenly approached unto free verse. The bitterness and desolation you convey quite successfully here are well-known to us all, but rarely so well expressed.

[Ruth]

Potent longing for release here, ghosts in the bottom of the glass never answer, seems an eternity lapses trying to figure them out!
Beautifully exorcised love, as always!
Hard hitting and devouring!
xx

[chillz]

0.o powerful write...nicely written ^_^

[Bubo]

Loss of love, be it any, death or in life is crippling........and we disappear into an abscess of pain which you have stunningly captured........

[Molafvt]

Holy s**t man. This is outrageous and terrifying all at once, especially since my girlfriend is leaving the first of the year. Yet in spite of current events, my past echos these sentiments to a tee and if I dreaded the future before, after reading this dreaded reminder,now I just may kill myself before hand to avoid this dark, deep self loathing reality you express here with such stirring angst. By, by my dark, empty friend. I'll see you on the other side.

[Angel Bird]

Ooohhh, you perfectly tread on the readers tinted rose-colored glasses with your wordless words, and the reader is confronted with the hard and naked reality! This is very powerful and impressive.
Brilliant job.

[Rory CJ Frankson]

************************************************** ya, you really got me now ******************

[plaster prayers, splintered mirrors]... a very memorable phrasing, that engenders a framing that must be thought through the context of your setting the Prose in Flow. It is Art Bro... in fluxta prosition, mon due.
Ja mon, dig it! The beat deals real, an it thunders...
I also admired the delay, in: Routine sadness, , Decayed madness
The presentation is cool, and well... a construct, of all that is not shallow.
It breathes the dust and I've been a roofer, it remind of that. That feel too of 'The Long and Winding Road.' To a somewhere's 'Nowhere Man, The Fool on the Hill' stands. With regret in hand, and ponders... Mud.
The s**t. That is flung in the face of lonliness and, that vague imprint.
Of the nothingness void.
That fills that glass, in relection of what was in it. Is, gone...
The residules, still left to contend. Always!

A ton of imagery here friend; to kick a round the pan. Blam blam, kick over the deal, an --- RUN for the Hills--- run for your life... this, is gravy!

*******************************got me so I don't know what I'm doin Oh ya *************

Write On / Right On! Romon in Review... you really got me now! :) Peace

[nothing]

Well written. I loved it. You need to write more like this!!! Great stuff.

Sarah.

[Vanesa Markovic]

This is good, very good.
I've been here before, the sleepless nights, the empty glass.
I know this all too well.
Wonderful work, and thank you for the request.

[Star Shaped Heart]

NOT REAL!!! SEE IT!!! LOL!!! :)