Ash + Snow

We shall be together/ for the remainder of Forever.

Ash + Snow

 

The Lord of Fire toiled for many days

And many nights

Until his creation was complete:

A beautiful woman

To accompany him as his wife.

“Ah, yes, my lovely maiden of fire,”

Proclaimed the Lord,

“We shall be together

For the remainder of this Forever.”

 

And he kissed her,

As light as the flecks of ash

His insidious sparks

Transformed her into.

 

The Empress of Ice watched from the clouds

She descended from the overcast sky

To sweep up the cool, grey powder

And take it to her vaporous palace.

She used her magic,

Instilled in her by the moon itself,

To breathe her frosty life

Into the flakey remains

Of the Lord’s bride.

“She lives,”

Told the Empress to the Lord.

“May she return to me?”

The Lord inquired happily,

“May we exist in the remainder of this Forever

In unfaltering plurality?”

The Empress shook her head sadly:

 

“I’m afraid not.

She is no longer a maiden of fire,

But gelid ash;

My Princess Snow,

And your blazing presence

Would only destroy her.”

 

And so the Lord of Fire continued his existence,

Carrying out his forlorn remainder of Forever,

In a smoldering rage,

That only the waters from which it stemmed

Could extinguish.

 

Author's Note

Be as brutal as you like. Thanks for viewing, at least. colon, space, close parentheses.

Reviews

[Jane P.]

Omgosh this is tragically beautiful! I love your imagery and use of colour (I haven't seen that before on this site!) you used to firmly established the contrasting tones. It was almost as if the red started out symbolising love, but in the end came to represent "smoldering rage".

A very well written and powerful piece. I love the almost mythological content and your use of language. I can't think of anything else to say, except, this is lovely!

[Writer #00]

Thanks, I tend to write darker poems and I enjoy making up myths : ) Glad you picked up on the changing color representation, and thank you for reading and sharing your opinion.

[G.A. Collins]

Even though I still don't entirely understand this, contextually, I fell in love with it emotionally. I loved the way you took such highly fantastical foundations met with a basic, simple plot...and the two contrasts in both The Lord of Fire and the Empress of Ice, and the emotions of love/loneliness and passion/rage just dragged me into the piece and really caught me up in the emotional connotations. I really enjoyed this creative piece!

[Writer #00]

I'm unclear as to what context you are looking for, but the theme is the inevitable tie of creation to destruction (along with the two you mentioned: lonesome love and passionate rage).
Also: I am glad you were strongly emotionally affected by this piece as some people I know have questioned my being a sentient life form. It means a lot, thank you for reading and sharing your opinion : )

[Debbie_Philly]

Very beautiful.... lots of imagery and passion in this piece... I liked it !! :)

[Writer #00]

Thank you much for reading, I appreciate it : )

[Tai Ryens]

Would not the fires of the Lord exhaust into more ashes for the gelid ash? Would not snow only hinder growth, and add into the ash what is not ash? I can almost taste the future problems stemming back to this moment, as the ashen deity grows within the remainder of forever . . .

[Writer #00]

You're spot on! There are definitely many problems awaiting in the future because of this moment. Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts : )

[Tai Ryens]

I smell teenage rebellion

[Writer #00]

Maybe you're smelling something else, this poem's entirely fictional--a way for me to jot down an idea for a story I had at the time, actually. : )

[Tai Ryens]

I was thinking of the gelid ash. Woe to Princess Snow who has to manage ash's teenage rebellion years

[Writer #00]

Oh, haha! : )

[Mizo4]

i like this poem, it makes me think of a setting for a fantasy story. It's very original and has powerful imagery. it reminds me of old poetry i dunno why it just does and this is a good thing, its sad and has tragic storyline which is good and makes the reader feel for the characters in the poem .

[Rhianne Ney]

:D Your poetic sense is great~! Please create a lot of creative poems and nicely expressed ones!

[Writer #00]

Thanks! I will if inspiration + time match up!

[Rhianne Ney]

Yeah I'd appreciate that

[Writer #00]

Keep writing, too! How is the Concurrence book coming along?

[Rhianne Ney]

Haha, I don't know really.... I've a lot of projects and I need to finish some. I'm planning to rewrite the first chapter also

[Writer #00]

Rewriting is an essential part to revision...but it can be annoying sometimes (for me, at least), good luck!

[Rhianne Ney]

Yes, mine too. I keep on rewriting at least five times and when I look back to it, I was only able to write five sentences

[Writer #00]

I feel your pain. *^*

[Rhianne Ney]

:D Yeah... this is the pain that we all go through

[Xerclipse]

I always loved how you visually arrange your poetry and the colors of your words. But I like the theme you delivered through this poem, fire destroys everything, but can also create something! Keep it up!

[Writer #00]

Thanks much for reading (the poem) and sharing your thoughts! Destruction and creation were the themes of this poem, as you seem to have noticed.