Above The Ski

About Fredship.

 

Chapter 1

 

In a place called the colourful land, fairy's, dragons, peguses, ogers and pixies roamed free in a beautiful peaceful land. Under the rule of the beautiful Queen Sangalot but, her sister The Evil Witch could not bare the sight of equality. So one gloomy night the evil witch put her sister in a deep sleep. Now the evil witch rules their land, and put a green fog all over their lands. Our story starts in a place called flower meadow. Were a Fairy with no wings is sat on a flower, the fairy had long blue black hair, sea blue eyes and a long blue dress and blue shoes

"hey.no wings" said a red fairy

"Bluebell" Bluebell said

"losers like you, are a disgrace to all fairies" said an orange fair

"you are aren't you" Bluebell said smiling, then they flew off.

Suddenly a peguses crashes on Bluebells flower. The peguses picks herself up, you see she has a rainbow body with white wings.

"sorry about that. haven't got use to landing yet" the small peguses said

"your a bit small for a peguses" Bluebell said

"yeah it's coo. you pixie?"The small peguses asked happily

"no. I'm Bluebell" Bluebell said

"pheniox. So why are you in Flower Meadow?"Pheniox asked happily

"I'm a fairy" Bluebell prodley said

"you don't have wings though" Pheniox said

"I know" Bluebell sadly said

"hey. you want a ride?" Pheniox asked happily

"sure" Bluebell said as she got on Pheniox and Pheniox flew.

"nice.huh" Pheniox said

"Beauty full. What's that?" Bluebell said pointing at a cage. Pheinox then swoops down and crashes

"sorry"Pheniox said as they got up on there feet and saw two ugly ogers sitting with a gold thing in a small cadge

"is that a dragon?"Bluebell asked

"yes. A bit small though" Pheniox said

"lets go save her" Bluebell said optimistic

"OK"Pheinox said about to go but Bluebell stopped her.

"lets think about how were going to do this. I'll smoke them and you free the dragon" bluebell said getting out three little seeds. Bluebell got on Pheniox who then swooped around the ogers and Bluebell through the smoke seed at them. The ogers couldn't see and bummed into each other. Bluebell got the key and unlocked the cadge. Pheniox and the gold dragon flew off. they then landed in a small mushroom place, the gold dragon smoothly put her feet on the ground and Pheniox tumbled.

"hey. you OK?" Bluebell asked

"fine. Thank you" the gold dragon said cutely

"your so cute and small"Pheniox Said Happily

"I'm Bluebell and this is Pheniox"Bluebell said politely

"What's your name?" Pheniox asked the dragon

"Crystal"Crystal said shyly

"nice to meet you"Bluebell said nicely

"lets all be friends"Pheniox said

"OK. That will be really nice" Crystal said

"So why did the ogers catch you?"Bluebell

"well, all my kind have joined with the evil witch but, I didn't. So the ogers catched me to get punished"Crystal said

"hey, were protect you" Pheniox said happily.

Author's Note

This is my first short story and I still have other Chapters to do. Be honest, tell me what u think.

Reviews

[TL Boehm]

the main thing - is to get your ideas down on paper or on your PC - we all make spelling errors - I know I do - (and I am horrendous about commas) but the polish can always be applied once the storyline is set. I am a firm believer in writing your butt off first - getting all the ideas out, the story and characters developed - then go back through and edit your content. Fill in gaps in the story line. Fix plot and character issues. then do a third edit - punctuation and spelling. Then a fourth edit. If you have a gem of a story, which this is, you can fix the grammatical issues as you progress. I agree, this would make a wonderful childrens story. Keep going with it.

[OrAnGe SmArTiEs]

You know what Im gonna say Hunny... Well done!!!! It wuld make a fantastic childrens story and I look forward to readin the rest! Love youu!!! Xxx

I like this. I think it is a good start. I hope to read more. I like the character Bluebell. She seems spunky. I like that quality. I like the idea that your story has people who don't fit in but they don't let others make them feel bad. Very good start. I just wanted to say I did see a few spelling errors but it didn't distract any from the story. Great work!

[winter]

I thought that this is a great piece of writing. It is so b-e-a-u-t-i-f-u-l! I am so goign to read more of your writing.

[[untitled]]

I love this. I love fairies. I think this is a great story. I liked that Bluebell didn't let the Orange fairy get to her. Great start. I hope to read more.

[Kelley Pascoe]

I only seen a few mistakes , but we all make them. I like the start of this Becky. I will be back to read the rest. Thanks for sharing.
Kelley Frost

[Captain Blackheart (The..]

An intresting piece. It has the basis of a good story...a fairy with no wings a small peguses and a golden dragon, what more could adventure fans ask for.....:)

[Fantasyfairy]

Awww, how sweet. Lovely tale of friendship and happiness. These would make lovely children's books. Send me the next chapter when you are done baby girl. Loving yea. XX

[Star-Runner]

I like it, I think it's very well written the way it is. I can't wait to read the others one.