I let you go

I let you go

I lived a life 

A life experiences from subjugation to freedom.

A life felt like one never kissed

 to one of expression 

I travelled a path

A path of not knowing to acknowledging 

One where lessons where learned

And times where loved ones came to pass

and to where I sought solace for knowing them 

and to times we shared 

I have lived a life 

under the expectation of norms

from a society with hang ups about people being different

From childhood

undercurrents to sensations gave to me a realisation that I was different  

I did not recognise myself in the fabric of life woven around me

from images to media 

I could not name it 

Until I learned deep inside 

I was gay 

I lived a life 

bullied and persecuted in my younger years, 

walked with a limp treated different for those limitations

and was not celebrated by others

 because

 I was seen in the eyes of others as 

different 

I lived a life 

one to which I wasn't proud about myself 

I perceived myself in negatives frames 

and these gave me sensations of shame and guilt 

to comfort the volume of the motion of these emotions

I became lost in food 

Sugar and cake 

And all that sweet 

I lived a life 

with heart through adverse times

teaching me to compassion and resilience 

I began to see a light 

Time then showed to me that we all have a backstory of histories 

And love must be our understanding

I lived a life 

a life lived that led to shame and guilt 

A lived in pain 

and now expressed 

A life lived the long way round 

A life lived 

one from body shame to self love 

Care and forgiveness has been the key

Unlocking my heart 

to shed away the pain 

Towards the love I shine 

Today 

I say to the old ways

I let you go...