No Worries

I wonder what it would feel like to sleep eternaly.

 

I

Feel

Everything

Fingertip tingles

Body still in warmth

Eyes dry blinking many

Breathing leveled easily taken

Head tilted to side hair down messy

The pink room dark quiet green light shines

Images floating in odd colors sounds unfamiliar

Content no stress no worries time only present

Future lost in silence school unimportant

Only soft life living loss of wanting

Appearance fading to soft air

Letting go entirely

Now dreaming

Adventure

Watch

Bye

Reviews

[jen -- JG]

This is a great visual piece of writing Rin.

I like the way you show the person's awareness of what is happening, the short broken lines are like the fragmented thoughts passing through a fading awareness.

The centre four lines show the beginning of the shift from awarness to the exact moment when awareness slips... a kind of limbo where all is calm, silent and nothing matters.

The final lines show a gradual letting go of everything so that awareness of self is no more until even the self itself, is no more.

A talented write here

Very well done

jen-JG

[Jade]

Wow! What a great piece! Visually it is wonderful, and your associations are great. I can read it over and over again and get something different every time.

Bravo to that!

Best,
Jade

[(*^.^*)Vivi(*^.^*)]

great writing...ive felt the intensity...the power... lol...well keep it up!

[[untitled]]

I liked this poem. The way the lines were written seem to show emotions that weren't stated. I liked it.