Bled Dry

a friend of mine fell hopelessly in love with a girl who cut out his heart

She scratched his world, that shark-fin girl,

She spread the kindling

Lit the torch…his Rorschach test guessed

Butterfly

But frozen moths appeared in hers.

 

He spent his heart with soul attached

His blood congealed in frigid veins,

She took the reins and rode him weak,

The days were skipped to speak

Of years; to end with tears

On wind-chapped cheek.

 

His love revealed, she bled him dry

To die inside beneath his skin,

Begin to wither like garden weed

Each seed reminds of what she killed.

This friend was broken, nerves exposed…

His bloodshot eyes

Forever closed.

 

His faith in feelings, shattered love

Above the fray,

Each rain-soaked day

Drip-dried above.

 

dan © 2015

Music: "Mud In Your Eye," by Nils Lofgren

Author's Note

Reviews

[modtoddinc]

I particularly enjoyed the line "Each seed reminds of what she killed." powerful imagery and metaphor of opposites... of which without we understand nothing. very cool.

[dan]

Todd, This was based on a true time in my life; this girl had really burned my best friend, just left him crushed. I could go into the whole story but I've done it a lot already. Scroll down and read some review replies below. Long story short: I got revenge against her FOR my bud. Thank you for the read/review. take care...dan

[~]

Ohhh.. some heartbreaks are more difficult than others, and the heart truly is blind.. good for your friend to have you to fall back to when darkness envelops him.

[dan]

ms, Yes I exacted revenge FOR him. Was it a violent retribution? Yes...emotionally violent. She got what she deserved, nobody s***s on my friend like that. Childish? Maybe...Do I regret it? NO. Thanks for the read/review. take care...dan

[~]

:) ah!! revenge.. a two edged sword I am afraid :)

[Brittany Zedalis]

You write of heartbreak achingly well.

[dan]

Hi Luna, Luna C? I gotta love that handle. Oddly enough I have had few broken hearts in my life. This one is a true story of how a girl he fell for big-time s**t on him in a very public way...he was heart-attacked. So I hatched a plan, knowing that it probably would not work out. I asked her out and we started dating. After a while she started having real feelings for me (and I was pretending likewise), so I waited till the time was right and I dumped her in a very public and humiliating display...oh it was great. Now I'm not really that kind of person but she destroyed my best bud and revenge was indeed sweet. BTW, this happened about 30 years ago. Now I'm mellow...really. Thanks so much for your read/review. I've bookmarked your page and will visit ASAP to return the favor. take care...dan

[Brittany Zedalis]

It's a crescent moon symbol, haha. I hope your friend knew what you were doing and didn't think you actually cared about her, lol. Otherwise that would've been incredibly awkward. And you're welcome for the review. ^-^

[dan]

No, once I broached the subject with him and told him my plan (again, we never thought it would actually work) he got on board right away. So it kind of worked out as planned. There were a few burps along the way but they were ironed out. Thanks again for your words. take care...dan
Oh, BTW I copied down the URL you mentioned on your page and I will check that out. dan

[Adam W Redmon]

This is beautiful. Wish I wouldve known the song was there had it muted from the last youtube video I watched haha. Keep writing. I love the morbidness in this poetry. Dark poems are my s**t.

[dan]

Adam, So you think my writing is s**t?...Oh wait...sorry, read that wrong. I just ran into a little tree and my heads not straight. Thanks for the read/review Adam. take care...dan

[John Alexander McFadyen]

An all too often story of insincerity causing a victim in a pseudo relationship. You capture the flatness of affect and the futility of it all in these verses.

[dan]

Thank you, John. I appreciate your read/review and insights. I've bookmarked your page and will return the favor ASAP. take care...dan

[Kelly Scheppers]

I can't imagine anyone intentionally hurting another with such intention. Good for your friend, he had you!

[dan]

Thank you Kelly. I'm not usually a vengeful person, but she really hammered my bud. I hurt her the same way she hurt Marty: emotional wreckage. Revenge is a dish best served cold, and this one had icicles hanging from it. Thank you for the read/review. take care...dan

[Matching Socks]

Oh wow, that's real good Dan!
The kind of woman that we love to hate!
A real she-devil. :)
Rorschach test... That's brilliant.

[dan]

Thank you, Ana. This was a true story, after she s**t all over my best friend I wound up dating her, then dumped her as rudely as I possibly could. One of the most satisfying things I ever did for a friend. Does that make me bad? :) take care...dan

[Matching Socks]

Bad? Nah... Not you. :)

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

She's an angel in guise of a heartless demon who sucks the living life and light of his. She is a vamp who feeds on naive souls full of love and generosity, because she hungers those qualities she so evidently lacks. I feel so much empathy for the poor dear's soul. He deserves only the best (I feel it). The pain of heartache aside, I loved this great deal. You painted a gorgeous abstract (but not ambiguous) canvas of madness, passion, blood, dying, indigo butterflies and dead moths, somewhere in between there is love, or whatever is left of it. I see it all in hues of reds and blues.

[dan]

Nadia, Wow did you actually know her? What isn't written is the fact that after she s**t on his soul I ended up asking her out; as soon as she expressed some real feelings for me I waited for the right time and dumped her as cruelly as I could. Revenge! Hence the song, with the lyrics: "Now ain't that mud in your eye?" Thanks so much for the read and review. take care...dan

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

Wowie!!! That must have been a cruel lesson, but I hope she learned what goes around comes around.

[dan]

Please know that when I said "as cruelly as I could" that the damage was to her emotional state, it wasn't violence...I never was one for violence. Just wanted to clear that up...dan

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

My dear friend, I did not imply any of that :).

[dan]

Nadia, I was not saying you implied that, it's only after I sent the message I realized that it could have been interpreted as a violent reply; I'm 58 and never in my life touched a girl/woman in anger, I'm so anti-violence I just didn't want any shadow of doubt in your mind; that's how strongly I feel about it. My wife was in a very abusive first marriage and she's still traumatized and I frequently have to help her through some difficult periods of remembrance. I'm sorry for getting on a soapbox, it's just an issue very close to me. Thank you for listening. take care...dan

[Nadia Gerassimenko]

Dear friend, do not worry I never thought of you that way. I have much respect and fondness for you and think of you as a very kind and gentle being. I am so very sorry your wife has had to go through such an awful trauma. It definitely sticks with you doesn't matter how many years have passed. Wounds heal very slowly, especially the most traumatic ones. I hope you and your wife will be able to overcome that someday. With love, affection, and compassion for one another. Be strong my friend and have faith!

[dan]

Thank you Nadia. Your empathy is comforting. take care...dan

[MsJewel]

He spent his heart with soul attached
His blood congealed in frigid veins,

You do dark so well Dan. The imagery is brilliant. Thankfully he is free of this woman and hopefully his heart has healed.

I love the last verse as well.
His faith in feelings, shattered love
Above the fray,
Each rain-soaked day
Drip-dried above

Brilliant!

:) Julie

[dan]

Julie, Thanks so much. This is actually a true story, a little artistic license applied, but actual events. I'm so glad you liked it. take care...dan

[...]

Dan, you certainly are an interesting read :) but, if we all keep doing what we don't like in others...just saying. Sometimes love just has to be for free, doesn't it? Hey, but what the hell do I know about the s**t :) This, as usual, was deeply thought, methodically constructed and a VERY interesting read. I seriously respect your craft, dear poet

[dan]

lynn, True story? About 35 years ago my best bud at the time fell in love hard; she strung him along and eventually ripped his heart out and stomped on it, grinding it to dust. I managed to get her to go out with me; she started having real feelings for me and when the time seemed right I s**t all over her, purely for revenge. That's what the song was about, revenge: "Now ain't that mud in your eye?" Thanks for your always insightful reviews. BTW, I am going to your page to review something. I have a hard time keeping up with all of my reviewing obligations, which is why I ask to be sent read requests, which I ALWAYS respond to. take care...dan

[...]

my reviews are free too, Dan :) If you make it by, I'll see you then