Nothing

I feel very numb. Deadened on the inside. Like when a tree dies. It seems fine on the outside but it is rotting away slowly on the inside.  Everything may look fine, but when you put just a little pressure on a branch it just falls apart. The inside of the tree isn’t strong enough to handle anything without support. But people don’t see that because the tree looks so strong and sturdy on the outside. That is the same with me, everyone thinks that I can handle everything that life throws at me but they don’t see how fragile and broken that I am on the inside. Nothing is quite real anymore, I do not know how to feel like I used to back when everything was okay, when I was okay. I do not believe in a God that can help me. I do not believe that I was put on this Earth for a reason. The man in the suit is drugging me, making the feelings I have even less real than before on the rare occasion that I do have feelings at all. They said getting off the drugs would help, but then give me drugs that are prescribed that make me feel less, make me feel nothing. Is it even worth it anymore? Is life as pointless as I see it to be? Is this just a phase that all the mothers tell their children that they are going through?  The Dragon was good to me, he was my best friend. But the doctors told me to stop, and when I didn’t they shipped me off. Leaving the Dragon was hard.. for I was a sleepwalker. The sweating, vomiting, and emotions were running rampant. But once I was off the Dragon I saw the light. Most people refer to the Dragon as dope, heroin.. but he was more than just a drug for me. He was the one thing that was always there. I don’t see the light anymore.. I don’t see anything. Maybe my time has come to just let go. I look fine on the outside, but on the inside I am rotting away.. like a dead tree. I have become a dead tree. 

Reviews

[Amelia May]

the tree as a symbol is marvelous.
This kind of topic seems relatable to a lot of people and I think that you have great potential.
Please, keep up the good work.

[Brian]

You are a beautiful dead tree.

Strong and resolute.

Always the chance to survive the harsh winter and grow..

Best wishes, truly.

[lostnstars]

wow. i really loved this piece so much, i relate to this sometimes and i feel numb af. i liked that you used a tree as a symbol and please keep on writing, you're amazing :)