In The Last Place That I Looked

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In The Last Place That I Looked

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I never really knew exactly
where my heart belonged
I’d wander in from town to town
but everywhere seemed wrong

No matter what I did
it never seemed to be enough
A tuckered out pretender
who had called his final bluff

It seems like I have always had
my face against the wind
The path is always steeper
when your heart is full of sin

It’s sad when all the things you want
are right behind a wall
It’s scary when you try to climb
and think you’re going to fall

I’ve spent my whole life fighting
just to let my soul be free
Never realizing that my troubles
were with me

I’ve walked so many miles
but I never really moved
My feet were always taking steps
but nothing would improve

I scaled one more peak to see
a wasteland down below
The trail only went one way
with no where else to go

I finally realized that I would
never find the end
I crawled out to the very edge
and started to descend

I walked into the dessert
looking for a flake of snow
They said I wouldn’t find it
but then how were they to know

You’re searching for a miracle
is what they said to me
You’re looking for one drop of water
in a deep blue sea

I told them that I didn’t wish
To tempt the hand of fate
I said the answers that we need
Can never come too late

They said no matter how I try
I can’t escape the truth
I told them I was ready
for whatever I am due

I finally stopped advancing
as I came upon a hill
The clouds above were moving
but my world was standing still

I stopped as mighty winds released
my spirit to the sky
I waited for the tears to fall
and hear the thunder cry

But all I felt was scorching pain
as I began to burn
I failed every chance I got
and now it was my turn

I fell down to my knees and
slowly lifted up the sand
I felt each second I had wasted
falling through my hands

I stared into the glaring sun
until I couldn’t see
Forgiveness was the only vision
that could set me free

I looked until the sky was black
and fell down on my face
Surrendering my dignity
I now was seeking grace

I felt my spirit lifting,
as a light began to glow
That day out in the dessert,
when the sky began to snow

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[demureminds]

Aw I love the ending and hope filled purpose of this poem. Very moving and endearing piece. Wonderful concept.

[Antonio Valentino]

thank you so much dear friend.. one of melodic pieces from way when back..

:)

[arbitrary jane]

this reads like a lyric. the kind your shoes sing on the pavement as you walk through burning cities of struggle and longing.
the last two lines... man... i close my eyes and 'mmmmm' like when the guitar sustains and then fades to a shadow.

[*~*Butterfly Kisses*~*]

Goodness Antonio, you've nearly brought me to tears reading this. Deeply heartfelt and emotional. Beautifully written, as always.

~anna rose

[emmajoy]

The style of this is different for you, I can't remember if you've written in specific meter before .. dare I say it's almost hymn-like.

If we're really honest, most people want to be and feel something different deep inside themselves. But life goes on, takes us over, values and ethics alter, we experience all kinds of stuff until nothing satisfies any more .. so, we look, we search, knowing there's something just out of reach, just a touch away.

Your words go through that and more .. it's like a personal journey, something you had to go on .. determined whatever happened you'd experience what you knew was there for you .. and you did.. you did.. you did!

Those last two lines reached me deep into my heart. maybe than any others I've ever read ..

[Cherrie Palmer]

I loved the ending

[FlawedByDesign]

Allow me to smile for a second at the marvel that is the female mind and how it inhabits a sensuous plain of existence which men are privy of. I think we will both admit we are sensitive, but seeing that this poem made 2/3 of the last reviewers cry, tells me you have done your job my friend. I think I better get to the review before I get proclaimed blasphemous :P

This is the first piece of yours I have read that rhymed and did it ever. I think the best rhyme scheme is ABCB and you've pulled it off. It really lends itself in creating a unique flow and it shows.
I understood that this man was out high and low looking for meaning in life, to shed some light and show him the way. Almost like some kind of prophet, you could say.
My favourite bit was,
"I fell down to my knees and
slowly lifted up the sand
I felt each second I had wasted
falling through my hands" - like the sand through the hourglass, so are the days of our live (stupid soap - hehe). It was a great metaphor.

Nicely done my friend for a first rhyming piece of your I've read that is - j/k

[Seashell]

Oh goodness....I'm just up and shedding tears already...tut tut !! I was travelling the journey with you..hoping and praying that you would get your wish.

This is one of the most beautiful poems I have ever read.

Now I gotta go and dry my eyes...and look towards the sun and plan the day, hoping my soul will be happy and content till tomorrow brings its luggage.

Thanks for share Antonio,
Babs xx

[Liza]

this is so touching and the imagery is outstanding
i felt the emotion
i saw a person a physical person, a physical body looking for its wandering spirit that finally thought itself into an aligned form of existence with body heart mind and soul
superb job!

[Sara Mercury]

WOW. I cried. Very moving. And very, very true!!!! You have to sink to the lowest depths and forgive yourself and embrace forgiveness for what you've done or you can't move on. Sounds like a religious poem, although I hesitate to use the word religious ... lol (Grates against me like nails on a chalkboard.) Religion is a falsehood - there is only truth, and you speak it well in this poem. Powerful words!

[He@ther!]

Great imagery and rhyming!:) Amazing use of tone as well:)
I love how well you built a sense of hopelessness and desperation, making the last stanza shine brilliantly with relief and triumph. Excellent work, a pleasure to read:)