When I Think of You

You were part of him

lovingly, I tucked you in at night

now I miss your funny faces

I would never say it out loud

you're the only thing I miss

that best part of me, when

you called me mom

I don't miss the craziness, 

the fighting and the brawls

I sometimes wonder

what she tells you, when

he doesn't show up until morn

but not often, the dog

also wonders,

about where you've gone

Reviews

[quinfinn]

hard to develop and adapt to a new routine when everything seems so alien, n'est pas? correct me if i am wrong, but i get the sense this is about adjusting to separation or even (dare i say it?) divorce....this piece speaks gopher holes full of profundity and i agree with jacob about the line about the dog....lends a realism to the whole worn out issue of lost liaisons...well penned!

[rhythm&blues]

Yes, most recently divorced, does it show? Thank you so much, I do appreciate you reading me.

[quinfinn]

it shows, but possibly only because i have been there more times than i care to let on..it gets easier...eventually! hang tough...

[rhythm&blues]

It's quieter and different, I will say that much, thank you again.

[quinfinn]

you'll come to appreciate and even embrace the peace and quiet...when that gets old, spread your wings and fly again.

[rhythm&blues]

Funny you should say, that's what all my friends say too, I think I'll take a little time for myself before I take the plunge again!

[quinfinn]

indeed you should.....get your ducks in a row ..good advice

[rhythm&blues]

Smiling at *ducks* :)

[lee von cleef]

My kind of puzzle. Love life loss and the unconditional grin of the dog, Funny how time lets your mind flow.

[KristynRuth]

I agree with the quinfinn it does have a very realness to it. Very nicely worded

[rhythm&blues]

Thank you for reading KristynRuth.

[Baby Ricochet]

Sad and moving. Nice write

[rhythm&blues]

Thank you Baby Ricochet.

[VALORMORE DE PLUME]

I like the openness. That is poetry at its best, in whatever style is chosen. The magic words that heal you can only be found inside of you. We can't think those words into being, we can only be open and let them come out on their own. Very nice.

[rhythm&blues]

Thank you so much Valomore De Plume, I appreciate your candid review and you have inspired me to continue writing.

[VALORMORE DE PLUME]

Thank you for sharing. Right on and write on.

[Angi]

The last lines made me so sad. This is a really moving piece. Divorce can be so hard, you have penned this really well.

[rhythm&blues]

Thank you, yes, it's very difficult and some of the scars remain long after the marriage is finalized.

[emmajoy]

A great sadness of a poem but, somehow beautiful, words placed eloquently but simply, honestly but gently brief, holding back a little.. your prerogative.

Truly hope you'll be able to find happier thoughts ahead.. in time.

[rhythm&blues]

Thank you Emma Joy, I have moved on, there are just moments of sadness, endings are always a sad thing for me.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Such a mournful piece, and yet done with so much clarity and sincerity. This piece speaks of a separation of the best part of a person, and that is possibly the hardest thing that one can endure in life. It does get better, but it never goes away. I quite liked this piece; simple, but flowed beautifully and the sentiment was fabulous (especially the little detail about "the dog also wonders, about where you've gone"--possibly my favorite lines).

[rhythm&blues]

Thank you, this is such a wonderful review, seems as though the dog is popular, and I almost left her out.

[Girl Friday (Sarah W.)]

Very good idea...it brings it back to the "personal" that really kicks up the emotion in the piece.

[rhythm&blues]

I think she thought so too. :)

[icelandicblue]

You've captured that melancholy that comes with quiet after the storm. When the storm moves on we're left cleaning and thinking. I felt a great sadness here. It's a very well written poem.

[rhythm&blues]

I think my heart just skipped a beat reading your review, you don't know how much this means to me, many thanks.

[icelandicblue]

Welcome to the site. We're happy that you are here.

[rhythm&blues]

I am happy to be here, everyone has been so nice, thank you again.

[Buddhistboy73]

I love this piece, as you can tell it comes from the heart, and is about real people's experiences. It jumps off the page with its "everydayness", not that that is meant to take away from this personal experience.
I love the last 3 lines the best....:)

BB

[rhythm&blues]

I can't begin to tell you how much I appreciate your words, yes, this is my life now, not very exciting, the everydayness, me and the dog. Thank you so much. :)

[Buddhistboy73]

Well, welcome to the Cafe, and glad you're making use of words and the fun they can bring by experimenting...:)