The Darkest Hour

I know its also the name of a movie but the name really supports the message, so don't think I've cheated the name 'cause I haven't!!! :/

As I look out

At the pitch black night

I gasp and I stare

At this wonderful sight

 

It was pretty much nothing

If I speak honestly

Just the colour of black

Painted on a sheet

 

It looked quite lonely

And looked quite sad

My heart almost cried

And I felt very bad

 

It looked like the doors

Of possibilities had closed

And darkness and silence

Had suddenly arose

 

It looked like the stars

Had been trapped in the clouds

And a shelter had captured

All cheerful sounds

 

But up cam the sunrise

In a few moments’ time

The sun beamed up light

And bells began to chime

 

That gave me a message

That I will never forget

Its always the darkest

Before the morn dawneth

 

So sing all in sorrow

And girls, don’t you cry

There’s always another day

To lift up and try

Reviews

[Moniba]

Amazing poem! One off the very best i've read, I dare say...

[SheActsLikeSummer]

Wonderful poem. Might do well in the contest I'm managing *hint hint, wink wink, nudge nudge* Anyway, I love how it started off, dark, creepy, as if there's nothing but sadness, but then you left us with something to think about. Even amidst the darkest hour you can find that little shimmer of light.

On another note I would say that the line 'The sun beamed up light' could use some revising. It would be easy to fix - if you want to fix it at all - because it doesn't have to rhyme.

Also, the third stanza's rhyming lines could use with more descriptive words. 'Sad' and 'bad' are okay but with the skill and... what's that word? you have shown all throughout the rest of the poem I think you'll be able to maybe tweak that a tiny bit.

I love how some of the words don't rhyme exactly, it adds to the spookiness. Wonderful poem - once again. You have great potential and I can't wait to read more of your work as you progress as a writer (as I know you will). And one more thing, I adore the 'morn dawneth'. Great touch. It's like, let's just add a little old English in there for a second.

[Southern Cross]

From despair to hope ..Beautifully written..I was there in the gloom and lifted with the dawn

[Wendy Seames Garner]

Wonderful, a great message you are getting across here. Just when it looks the darkest, the sun always rises.

[Aeternal Oceanfire]

There is always tomorrow! It's only a day away! What a beautiful, hopeful piece! Marvelous!

[AK]

Really nice, Rhea! I loved your use of words. It gives a very good feeling of the darkness. Beautiful imagery. My favourite line was 'Before the morn dawneth'. Lol I. Addicted to archaic and shakespearian English...

[closed..acct]

Really wonderful read, kind of sad yet hopeful.
I enjoyed this.