Dragon Flame Pain

Not rated, take as you will, kind of messed up, don't read unless you're ready to accept a messed up sense of humor. Read at own judgement.

In the darkness of the night in their cozy dragon cave, Cindy began to stir.

Lazily, she opened her eyes and looked over at her husband Leviath sleeping nearby. His chest was rising and falling calmly, but what caught her attention was his sleeping position. He was laying on his back, with his legs spread apart. She was sleeping right at his tail, so it was impossible not to notice this.

She didn't mind, he was her husband afterall, but she couldn't suppress the giggle. He looked so ridiculous sleeping like this, but at the same time, kind of hansom.

Suddenly, an idea hit her hard, it'd been something she'd secretly wanted to try on him for a while, but she had never thought of the perfect scenario. Now she suddenly had an idea, and she couldn't resist.

But then she hesitated. Was that too intense? She shook her head. That's what was great about dragon scales, they were basically invincible. You could do almost anything to them and it would never do the dragon any harm. But even though they couldn't come to harm that way, they were still as sensitive as anything else and whatever was done to them would be felt the same.

Oh, this idea was too good, she had to act on it before she changed her mind.

She rushed through the cave and found the place where they kept their oil. Quickly, she grabbed it, and brought it over to her husband. Fortunately, he hadn't moved.

Moving up to him, she uncapped the oil and started to pour it on him, right in the opening where his legs were apart. Fortunately, he was a deep sleeper, and didn't notice.

Now, for the final step. She could have done this part with her own breath, but that seemed too direct, so she chose to go with a more indirect method. Putting the oil down, she picked up a stick. Breathing on the stick, she lit in on fire.

She looked down at her husband. Was this even fair to do to him? It wasn't like he wasn't a nice guy. She thought back to the first time she'd brought up she might do such a thing to him.

"You know what sweetheart," she'd said, "Someday I think it might be funny if I were accidentally hurt you where it hurts most."

"Whatever," he'd said, probably sarcastically. It wasn't exactly a yes, but it was the closest she was going to get if she wanted to surprise him. At the very least, he knew she had a thing for it, so what else could he expect? She was glad she wasn't male, there was just something about males that said "Do this to me!" whether they really asked for it or not. (Maybe it was because when they laid that way, it was near impossible not to see them that way!)

She looked at the torch, then back at Leviath. In a moment, there was going to be no going back for him. Her heart felt so bad for him...

Okay! Let's do this thing!

"Oopsie!" And with that, she "accidentally" dropped the torch.

In an instant, Leviath ignited on fire, or at least the part of him where Cindy had poured the oil. His eyes snapped open, and he let out a sudden cry. What was happening to him!? It was hot! It hurt! It BURNED! The most sensitive place on his body, so vulnerable and unprotected, was on fire!

"OW! OW!" He cried, scrambling to the wall, pressing his back against it as he processed what was going on. "FIRE!" He cried, his legs flailing desperately on either side of the flame, not sure what to do, but knowing they had to do something, "I'M ON FIRE! MY- MY- MY B- OW!"

He tried to scramble back more, but his back just slid off the wall. He rolled on the floor, the fire continuing to flare. His talons instinctively reached for where the pain was, but they instantly jerked away as they got too close to the flame. Though burning talons surely would hurt nowhere near as much as what he felt now, it was the classic instinct to avoid inflicting more pain on himself, even if it meant easing the pain in the long run. It hurt worse than he could imagine, but he could not ease it without causing more pain to the other parts of his body, something his reflexes prevented him from doing.

So he rocked back and forth, his body desperately wanting to clench itself up, but not being able to without causing more of it to come in contact with the flames. He could do nothing but keep his legs apart, and resist reaching with his talons, while the pain raged in the most sensitive place imaginable, left vulnerable and unprotected. He writhed back and forth, his body not knowing what to do with itself. "IT BURNS! IT BURNS! OH, MAKE IT STOP! MY SENSITIVE PLACE! OW!"

And his wife, she just stood there watching, an amused look on her face. What was she thinking seeing him burning up like this writhing in male pain? She must think he looked ridiculous!

He writhed himself into the ground, trying to make the flame go out, but there was too much oil on him, that it wouldn't stop. He scrambled on his talons, crying out, nothing to be done to ease the burning.

Cindy couldn't help but laugh, it was just so funny seeing her husband, so strong and hansom, being brought down by the most ridiculous aspect of himself. Leviath overheard her laughter, and instantly he knew this wasn't some weird accident. "YOU DID THIS!" He cried. "YOU DID THIS TO MY MOST EMBARRASSING SENSITIVE PLACE!"

"Of course I did! I couldn't help it! I'm sorry, but you just look too funny this way!" Cindy burst out laughing.

"TO YOU! THIS HURTS!" Leviath cried. His wife was CRAZY! But he couldn't think about that now, the pain was consuming his sanity! It wouldn't cause him any long-term harm thanks to his scales, but that fact did nothing to stop the pain!

"Water!" he cried. He desperately scrambled to the small creek that ran through their cave, and tried dropping himself into the fire to put it out, but it didn't work, it only seemed to be causing it to spread. The water just boiled, burning him more! So desperately did his body want this water, to cool the burning, but it was only making it worse! "WHY'S IT NOT WORKING!?" He cried, flopping besides the creek helpless, continuing to writhe, "LET THE WATER WORK!" Oh how good the water looked, so cool and not-fiery, how could it be so worthless!

"Oh, I used oil to start the fire, you're going to have to find some other way to smother it. Or you're going to have to just wait for it burn out on its own."

"WHY YOU MAD PYROMANTIC SADIST!" He cried.

"I'm good with being py-romantic," Cindy replied, fluttering her eyes, "I feel very romantic seeing you so hot like this." Cindy sat down. "Now, while you deal with that, I'm going to sit over here and watch."

Leviath cried out. Apparently he wasn't going to get any sympathy from his wife. And of course she wouldn't, this was too ridiculous of a situation to take seriously. But no matter how ridiculous the situation was, it didn't stop him from roaring and howling his head off in his pain. Ridiculous or not, it HURT!

And while he roared and writhed his fire through the dirt like a complete weirdo, despite his assumption, Cindy did have some sympathy for him. But in a funny way. Normally, she would care for him, and be there for him, and want to share with him anything, even his hardships, but not this. This was something he'd have to go through on his own, while Cindy sat on the sidelines finding amusement in his suffering. If it was something serious, she'd want it all to be over for him, or share the burden, but this wasn't serious, was it? So though she had a slight pity for him, it was more, nuh-uh, any other moment in your life I'd be willing to switch places with you, but let there be this one moment where I'm glad I'm me and that I'm not you, one that I can actually laugh about.

"How you feeling," she asked after he'd been hollering and writhing for quite some time.

"HOT! I'M HOT!" he cried.

"Of course you're hot, that's why it's so funny seeing you like this." Cindy answered. "You must already know, I like hot guys."

"IT BURNS! IT BURNS! MAKE IT STOP!"

But no matter how much he scrubbed himself through the dirt, the sticky oil wouldn't rub off very effectively, the flame just kept going, its heat continued penetrating the most sensitive aspect of himself, into his very being.

Cinder watched. This just would not end, maybe she added too much oil. She shrugged, it'd go out eventually, right, it would just be a long show.

Unfortunately, Leviath was getting desperate. The pain, it was just too intense! "HELP!" He roared into the sky, "MY WEAK SPOT! JUST MAKE IT STOP!"

"Oh, don't worry, it'll stop eventually, you just have to give it time." Cindy assured him. "But then again, I have nothing to worry about, I'm not you," She added with amusement, "I can just sit back and wait for the flame to go out, then everything will return to normal. For you, it's much more complicated. Sure things will return to normal for you to, but I'm glad I don't know what unbearables exist on that road before then. Of course you can't bear another second, but I can wait all night. Let's hope it's all night, may be unbearable for you, but more funny for me. I can take it, and that's what matters."

Leviath roared into the sky. NO! NOT ANOTHER SECOND!

Cindy burst out laughing. She was so cruel, but this one time she didn't care, it was just too funny.

Unfortunately for Leviath, it was closer to Cindy's prediction. There was no relief from the burning, but the Universe didn't seem to care, seemed it had looked down on his predicament and deemed it funny. Any other dragon it would be, but NOT HIM! He was too himself for this, other dragons weren't, let it be them it happened to instead!

And the oil just kept burning and burning and burning. Cindy began to get worried. How long would this oil take to burn? It could take days, weeks! It was funny for a few hours, but if it went on too much longer, it was starting to feel a bit much.

Hour after hour it burned - it would surely be morning soon - every second Leviath knew he couldn't stand another, roaring and howling through the whole thing. Cindy still found some amusement from this, but at the same time, she was starting to feel bad for him. As funny as this all was, she figured he'd need a break sometime... In maybe another hour- Okay, it was too early to let up yet. Let the poor dragon writhe. Let her blessed self indulge. Besides, when it was all long and done with, it wouldn't really matter if it lasted a few extra hours, right, these few extra hours only really mattered for the enjoyment or discomfort of their current selves, their selves a year from now wouldn't really care, right.

As long as it did end...

But finally, it seemed as if the Universe had decided Leviath had had enough, and the fire slowly began to flicker and die out. Finally got all the sticky oil had burned off him, and he smothered the rest of the flame with the dirt of the cave floor. Once over, he just laid there a moment trying to process his existence through such pain, still squirming a little in his discomfort.

Finally, he turned to Cindy. "What on Earth were you thinking?"

Cindy chuckled, "It was funny, and you look so hot..."

Secretly, Leviath kind of thought it was kind of funny, not what had happened to him, but that Cindy had thought it was funny... Kind of made her hot. But still, he couldn't just let it go without speaking his mind. "Well, it was horrible."

"I know," Cindy replied, "That's why it was so funny."

She was hopeless. "I hope that when you lay eggs, they all come out on fire and covered in spikes," Leviath grumbled.

Cindy's jaw dropped. But then she regained herself. "I probably deserve that, don't I?" She asked with a nervous titter, considering the concept.

"Completely," Leviath replied.

Of course, he didn't really mean it, but unfortunately, when it came time for them to have their eggs, Leviath's wish still came true. As Cindy screamed her head off, regretting her entire existence, Leviath couldn't help but sort of regret his wish (a little). Cindy on the other hand couldn't help but sort of regret what she'd done to Leviath (a little. Well, not really, it was kind of still too funny of a memory to really regret), but that is another story.

In the end, these two really did love eachother, maybe they just needed some sort of marriage therapy or something.

[Insert obligatory out-of-nowhere Marriage Therapy For Dragons ad here]