A day

This morning ,in my garden ,

I took a walk, looked at all beautiful flowers

I tasted all ripen fruits ,sung all my favourite tunes

But the smile on my face only appeared for you

I miss the time you held my hand and

I wished clock would stop right there

You make my hands sweat and my mind freeze

 

This afternoon ,by my window

I saw weary travelers battle these heat waves

This spectacle touched the nightmares ,

I so selfishly try to escape, where

We face our inevitable fate ,where

we cry and fight but can never be by other's side,

Where we long and love, just  not enough

 

This evening ,in my mind

I stole a look  of this heart,

Which aches on the thought of being apart

But I need my sanity back

Reviews

[Lorry]

Sometimes it is the places we enjoy the most that takes our thoughts to the shoulda beens, that pause our thoughts of our surroundings and take us back to what never turned out to be our path in the first place, but it doesn't mean they're forgotten and never thought about, if only things worked out a bit differently.
Sometimes it's the people we love that take our sanity and although we are glad we cling on to that, it doesn't mean we can forget them so easily.
Great job in collecting these thoughts into some sense and the title "A day", fits really well, with its it could be any day feel.

[retreating ghost]

" Sometimes it's the people we love that take our sanity and although we are glad we cling on to that, it doesn't mean we can forget them so easily." Well said . Your review is exactly what I would want to read in the summary section of this poem .Thank you for your praise :).

[John the Baptist]

The action in this offering takes place in three locations, a garden, by a window and in the mind. The garden, though it is beautiful, reminds the speaker of a lost love. The window, though by a different path, also has to do with a loss of someone. The mind section continues the theme, but ends with a plea for sanity. Perhaps depression is the unspoken theme of this poem, depression triggered by loss.

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"we long and love, just not enough"
that line is a treasure...

I want to have written that.
j.

[emmajoygreen]

Such a sadness to read (twice) - fading away, carrying memories just cos adult complaints are more like playground squabbles. Perhaps walking away a while, going for long walks, writing long poems, etc., sharing what's done apart rather than sparring over flaws needing unselfish adjustments. Guess your words make sense, exampling the worst of behaviour BUT, worst of all is - the loss of caring, wanting, needing - tis NOT that hard to solve, if truly wanted.

[retreating ghost]

Thank you so much for reviewing my poem .I agree with you ,adult complaints are more like playground squabbles. I also wanted to tell you that this poem is entirely fictional . Your advice is really honest and it is highly appreciated thanks again.

[emmajoygreen]

Fiction is often more truthful than fact!

[e]

I really enjoyed reading this poem, it’s so hard missing someone so intensely

[retreating ghost]

Thank you for the review ,glad you enjoyed it :)