Red Eyes and Alcohol

 

I celebrated, after my shower, with half a bottle of wine. My parents would never notice it was gone. Swallowing the scarlet liquid felt like drinking blood, but tasted twice as sweet. I deserved to drink blood. But if there weren’t people like me, wouldn’t the world be completely different? Worse? I drank another half of a glass, re-corked that bottle, and escaped to my sheets.

My room, while cluttered with my obsessions of crime shows and psychology texts, was comfortable. It was just cozy enough to feel warm, and the green bed sheets summoned me for a nap before school. I giggled as the walls spun and collapsed onto the comforter. I heard the door open and shut, and pretended to sleep. Pretending turned into reality.

I awoke feeling like my head had been squeezed between two hundred-pound cinder blocks. I showered again, scrubbing at my skin desperately, knowing that I’d made a bad choice last night in combining alcohol and adrenaline. I tilted my head upwards and drank the warm droplets straight from the faucet. Instantly, my pain began to ebb. While brushing my hair in front of the mirror, I noticed that my eyes were bloodshot.

I arrived at breakfast just before my parents began to stir in their rooms. Cereal didn’t help take away my nausea, but I had to eat something.

School began horribly. Skull met me halfway down the hall, between our lockers. She looked at my eyes. “Blair, are you ok?”

“Yeah, long night.” I replied, knowing that she could never find out.

She hugged me lightly. “Have you been drinking?” She whispered in my ear.

I nodded.

She dug into her bag a little and then pressed a small bottle of eye drops into my hand. “You need em, trust me.” She winked and walked away.

I spent a good fifteen minutes in the bathroom trying to apply them, and was late for class. By lunchtime, my eyes were red again, but at least they weren’t sore, and my headache was gone.

“Sweetie, you look awful!” Bunny announced. “The English essay wasn’t that bad, was it?”

I shook my head. “Nah, I got drunk.” I giggled. “Don’t get me wrong, it was a long night, but this,” I said, pointing to my eyes “is proof of the evils of wine.”

Crimson giggled unnervingly.

I smiled at her crookedly, sharing the private facial conversation. Her giggle had said yes, it’s evil while my smile had replied I know, but it’s so good!

Skull seated herself with a Styrofoam box, which contained a salad. She winked, joining in the facial conversation. I watched as she crumbled saltine crackers over her lettuce, tomatoes and carrot shreds.

Bunny nodded knowingly. “Trust me sweetie, after New Year’s, I know.” He gestured towards his new outfit: girls’ bellbottom jeans and a girl-cut t-shirt with Tinkerbell printed on the front. He was out of the closet today. “You like?” He stared at me while he said it, as Crimson and Skull both had full mouths.

“Yep. Actually, I love it!” I smiled and dug into my yogurt cup.

He giggled. “I’ve been getting stared at all day! It’s kind of bad, but at least I’m not being as secretive. Trying to hide things sucks.”

I pulled away in my head, guilty for a moment. I wanted to tell him where I’d been last night and why I had really drunk the wine. I bit my tongue, and then forced down another spoonful of yogurt.

I noted that Crimson looked ashamed. She’d been doing so well lately, and wanted to tell Bunny and Skull, but was afraid they wouldn’t see her the same way. I blinked at her, and tilted my head. She reacted by wiping away the guilt, and hiding behind a mask of serenity.

“I like it.” Skull finally found her way into the conversation again. “It’s very you. I think it’s probably just a bit of a change, and that’s why everyone’s noticing.”

I nodded at him. “Yeah, I’m glad you’re out there as yourself instead of just part of who you are.” And I’m glad that I only show part of myself. Oh, if only I could be accepted the way you are!

Reviews

[Brie]

Very entertaining! I like the tinkerbell shirt touch.
-Brie

[Bill Grimes Jr.]

Excellent work Penny.....gripping and well crafted..... I have known this demon intimately over a 30 year fog.......I am grateful for Gods grace who saw fit to deliver me from its vile clutches before it killed me at age 42. If by chance this is a true story, I recommend hitting your knees and laying your burdens in Gods loving lap. He will deliver you from alcoholic hell just as he did for me. I send you peace and love my friend.


Bill :-)