Could Of

Could Of

 

You know, you could have had me

the funny bed head me

or the silly, you know

man silly me

all wrinkly after a shower

old spice me

or the hand holding,

walk on the beach me.

 

You could have had me

at “hi there”

your smile and bright eyes

singing with my music inside

the notes pulsing in my veins

driving me crazy in your sweet touch

and I would have crashed into you

 

You could have had me

inside and out

upside and down

plus side ways and around,

under the moon

on a starlit sky �"

yes, you could have had me.

It’s not like I don’t think of you

everyday

all the time

I imagine the sound of your voice

as sweet nouns

wrap around adjectives

and sensual syllables

tickle my ears.

Can’t you tell

I want you to want me?

 

Aztec Warrior/redzone  11.5.16

Author's Note

...thanks for reading...

Reviews

[Ted Kniffen]

Nicely done, RZ. You've ramped up the competition.
A good sentiment written in a lovely style. Good write

[iliOZ]

your poem reminds me of my own story.
the good thing?
she had me and still has me.

so...i loved to read it!

[redzone]

good for you and thanks for your comment

[D Connolly]

Damn, sounds like a perfect life! Makes me want to go home and love on my husband a little :)

[redzone]

that should make him happy Dani... and you... ;0) thanks for the visit and nice words left on this poem...

[barleygirl]

Long ago I used to listen to country music (before it started sounding like pop). Last night I watched a TV concert with Garth Brooks (old fave) & heard the song: SHAMELESS . . . this is what your message reminds me of . . . the way a person can be totally shameless, as far as loving the other person & being willing to do most anything for them. You've painted this word picture so well, now I'll cross this writing idea off my list! *wink! wink!* I've kicked dirt in the teeth of guys such as this, much to my chagrin all these years later. I wish I would've valued this trait of being completely attentive to another person you love, which you've shown us here so well & with originality. The subtle thing I love about the way you express these feelings, your message is kinda hesitant, kinda like the guy is a little embarrassed to admit how hooked he is on the other person. This internal conflict is nicely hinted at . . . *smile* (((HUGS)))

[redzone]

wait, no crossing out writing ideas, nope.. Margie, I would always read... I have had dirt kicked on me for these ideas, mocked and dismissed, but still how else would you treat another human being, a woman, and especially one you love... lots of people, men especially do not see women as equals and with all the ways this is enforced and reinforced in society today it is a constant struggle to maintain this view of equality and worth all the dismissals and dirt.. and we all learn this, it goes against a lot of social traditions..

my life is filled with the experiences of playing the typical male Margie and I wish I hadn't so you are not alone.. key thing is did we learn and change from it.. do we try to do better...

I love your comments, their openness and honesty, and going where they need to go in analysis... always welcomed Margie, thank you..

[barleygirl]

When we have the world by the tail, we act like dickheads (except some blonde-bouffant 70-year-olds don't outgrow this childish outlook). Then when life gets harsh for years at a time, we learn what really matters (((HUGS)))

[redzone]

it's the learning that counts and the acting on it... especially when we have the world by the tail... and in his case, the mind and learning has melted to the point where it is the hair that is keeping his head attached...;0)

[Papaya]

I don't think men offer those things anymore. The hand holding and the walks...
Imagining all those things that could have been can be very uplifting, like a high.
But when reality sets in we come back down and just sigh...
I really like this love poem (that could have been more than a love poem). :)

[redzone]

Ana, you know only us old men are allowed to be cynical, you are much too young... on the other hand I think most men do not know how to be loving in this kind of way and I am really sorry you have not had someone to hold hands with you, walk on a beach with you and watch the sun come up or the stars twinkle at night... shouldn't this be more the reality than not??!! doesn't even have to be a beach but anywhere.. I have always loved holding hands.. so Ana, anytime you get to NYC, look me up and if you want I will gladly and warmly hold your hand... ;0)

oh, and thank you for your great comment and visit, sorry I was kinda lost in a "could of" reality there for a minute... lol... ;0)

[Papaya]

LOL. :) You're welcome and thank you for the kind offer.

[Lydia Shutter]

And of course, your words bring to mind another song, "I want you to want me" by Cheap Trick! The open honesty of the emotions here drew me in. The regret that the emotions are not accepted is like a knife in the heart. So intense. "sweet nouns wrap around adjectives" Delightful! I could almost smell the Old Spice and see them holding hands along the shoreline. Wonderful, Curt....and also "nice" of course. Lydi**

[redzone]

love that song Lydi, yes Cheap Trick originally, but I like the Letters to Chloe version even better... and such "nice" words you left on this poem, thank you Lydi... could of is a pain in the a*s.. lol.

thank you again Lydi

[Kelly Scheppers]

All the woulda-coulda-shoulda's laying in the sun, talking 'bout the things they woulda-coulda-shoulda done. But those woulda-coulda-shoulda's all ran away and hid...from one little did!


"old spice me
or the hand holding,
walk on the beach me". ...now that sounds like a friend, in deed!

[redzone]

I know and all I wanted was that single "did"... hmmmm, think it was the old spice Kelly??? ;0)
read moreI know and all I wanted was that single "did"... hmmmm, think it was the old spice Kelly??? ;0)
thank you so much Kelly for those woulda coulda shoulda's they made me smile...

[Kelly Scheppers]

I love a man who can wear a fragrance. Most men don't even bother, but I think it's a definite turn on!

[Sami Khalil]

all the time

"I imagine the sound of your voice

as sweet nouns

wrap around adjectives

and sensual syllables

tickle my ears."

Romantic, nostalgic and mesmerizing. Such a soft tone to it. A music to the ear. Wonderful...:)....................

[redzone]

aahh Sami, always nice when you stop by.. love your sweet comments especially since you write such romantic poems yourself...

[Sami Khalil]

You are welcome muchly. .......::::))))

[jacob erin-cilberto]

"i want you to want me, i need you to need me, i'd love you to love me" (cheap trick)

yes, the could "of's"
the would "of's"

if only she would have been the object of your preposition...

nice play on words here, Curt...

[redzone]

prepositions, damn Jacob I didn't preposition her in those nouns and adjectives...thanks Jacob... I guess I didn't play with enough words... lol..

I like the cover of this song done by letters to cleo as well as the original by cheap tricks...

thanks so much Jacob... your words mean so much to me...