STUCK

... Fri night "quickie"...

STUCK

I’m in a stuck mood.
Words flow in quicksand
filled with sharp tooth allegories
and those that do escape,
Are glued to my tongue.
They may taste like caramel fudge
but come out only as
incoherent globs of unfortunate consequences.

It’s kind of like what happens
after that first kiss
wraps you in faerie mist
and transports you to the moon
with no way back.
But though the mind is jumbled,
one word does escape-
small, simple, demanding:
MORE!!

Aztec Warrior/redzone 9/23/16

 

Author's Note

...thanks for reading..
a "quicky" cause I wrote this quickly... lol
captch: chipchop

Reviews

[costa siwale]

It’s kind of like what happens
after that first kiss
wraps you in faerie mist

A fantastic expression, more especially regarding poetry..how sweet the words that linger.
well crafted my friend

[redzone]

thanks so much Costa, happy you enjoyed my "stuck mind"... lol

[costa siwale]

even been 'stuck' is an inspiration, and that's the beauty of poetry. you welcome my friend

[Lydia Shutter]

"They may taste like caramel fudge
but come out only as
incoherent globs of unfortunate consequences."

Such delicious lines here....really! Then the second stanza hints at delightful sensuality. Nothing like that first kiss, is there? Yes, Curt, this is a proper Friday night write...I deem it so! :) Love that Hall and Oates song too. So nice! Lydi***

[redzone]

thanks Lydi, wasn't sure about Hall an Oates at first but it grew on me... lol.. but am sure that I really appreciate your visits and "nice" comments...

[Ruth]

Reminds me of the process of writing as well as a first kiss :) You always have a charm to your writing that flows with precision and makes me smile :)

[redzone]

see Poppy your smile is even better than a "first kiss" well almost anyway... lol ;0) so glad this moem makes you smile... I love when you visit and leave wonderful comments..

[Ruth]

Always my pleasure hon...your poetry is always a beautiful experience x

[barleygirl]

Now that you mention it, I remember the way a young guy would become tongue-tied before & after an impending kiss . . . but me being a motor-mouth, I wanted to know what he was thinking, so I would ask & ask, then be disappointed when he could not say a thing. Even tho your poem is a "quickie" it unearthed a long-ago memory of the difference between courting young guys & articulate young girls! *smile* And yeah, "MORE" was usually the only thing a guy could verbalize at that point! Well done! (((HUGS)))

[redzone]

if I would have been me back then I would have answered with more kisses... cause after the first kiss the rest are easy and more needy... ;0) funny, cause it was usually me who asked the "penny for your thoughts" question... and all I got was a smile... which of course I interpreted as MORE... lol..

thanks Margie I like your questions and observations and nice comments and your visits...

[1VJ]

Ah that first kiss, who could ever forget it. Stuck like gooey caramel fudge, indeed MORE!

[redzone]

exactly!!! thanks Paloma for your visit and for that gooey caramel fudgy review... ;0)

[Papaya]

This reminds me of all the times love left me tongue tied. I always say dumb things in the early shy and nervous days but that "more" is always there.

[redzone]

Papaya, I always enjoyed those "shy and nervous days".. lol but usually when looking back hehehe.... so you too get all dumb at this time and here I thought I was alone in this saying and doing dumb and silly things... lol... wait I always say and do dumb and silly things even if not "in love".. ;0)

thanks Papaya for your review and making me feel dumb and silly... ;0p

[Lyn Anderson]

Interesting how two seemingly diametrically opposed ideas can come together in one coherent poem. Sometimes a quickie can be quality. This is one of those instances.

[redzone]

while I was mainly referring to how quickly I wrote this and used that idea as a dichotomy of sorts, I definitely agree with you about a quicky can be of quality, especially if the release is mutually satisfying...

[Robert Haigh]

Some inventive imagery in this write. I like it!

[redzone]

thanks Robert, appreciate your words and visit...

[jacob erin-cilberto]

yes, a first kiss is like that...if it is good there are always the more relaxed and passionate ones to follow..

and if the words come out right, the keyboard and poet have that passion...and poems are born.

j.

[redzone]

I like your words here Jacob.. yes a poem is born from the flames of a first kiss, or from gooey caramel... lol.. thanks Jacob I am always glad you stop by...