The Tale of Eden

a short poem of impact.

All of my life my story’s been told

In every corner of the world.

My pages are torn, old and worn,

Yet my legacy lives.

There have been many children drawn from me,

They all have tales of their own,

Yet mine stands still till the skies are gone.

I , the tale of Eden.

Author's Note

Does the length add or take away from the main idea?

Reviews

[C. Rose]

First off, cool.
"My pages are torn, old and worn," is my favorite line from a phrasing perspective. I especially like the rhyme within the line, yet spaced a bit.
My favorite line from an imagery perspective is "Yet mine stands still till the skies are gone" - though I also like the double word play of stands still till. (Should till be til or 'til?)

"There have been many children drawn from me" is awkward compared to the brevity and flow of the other lines. Consider "Many children have been drawn from me" or something shorter.

Yet again, you've written from an interesting perspective.

[Rosezelene Ersa]

Quite honestly, I did not expect such a positive response to this short little poem. It was written only a little while ago, perhaps a few weeks, with the story of the garden of Eden in mind. thank you so much for your review on this poem, it's given me more confidence that my writing may be better than I give it credit for.