The Journey

A piece written while thinking about the person I love, away in a foreign country, wanting to come back to see her :)

With a guitar on my back, and love at my side...
I search for you,
As the sun starts to sting...
It wants me to stop, I cannot abide...
My feelings for you,
they're giving me wings...
Trapped in a tunnel, the light I can't find...
The path to you,
I walk as I sing...
Reality and Dreams now hard to divide...
I call for you,
Like sleepy flowers call for spring...
A thought echoing in my mind...
An image of you,
Like the sound of a string...
Igniting my heart, and making me blind...
It beats for you,
You beautiful thing...

Author's Note

I'm aware of the rhythmic issues of this piece, so I recommend reading it a bit slower :)

Reviews

[Mizo4]

image of a guy with his guitar, the night is drawing to a close as the sun sets and his mind is on the one he adores. Cool poem, neat imagery.

[Pryde Foltz]

Extremely romantic poem. And personally I subscribe to the 'thou shall not count' maxim. Doesn't mean I do not like a piece constructed to a precise meter; I just prefer, personally. to leave the math to ... well ... math and let the words create their own rhythm but never at the price of meaning and impact. More organic, I think.

[Pryde Foltz]

Unless, you are writing a song of course. ;)

[Mirko Galušić]

I think just as same as you do, but I just wanted to be easily understanded by readers, because I know that there is a spot that has a slight change in rhythm... I never count or do anything like that, in fact, you can say that my work is 95% surrealistic, by that I mean that it's almost like a cite of thought, with minimum corrections (only those small corrections keep it from being 100% surrealistic). So, I hope that I've explained at least a little bit of what I thought, thanks for the review, means a lot :)

[Pryde Foltz]

It is always treat when the poems come like that. Surreal-like I mean.

[SiyaMetaphoric]

Its very easy going kinder reminds me of a good sunday chilled vibe