Broken

She felt something broken within her
But she didn't know what
So she decided to fix it all
She fixed her hair. Her makeup. Her clothes.
She fixed the people she cared for.
The things she loved.
She fixed her views and her opinions
The way she spoke and the way she dreamt.
She fixed it all.
Until she was a mess of sutures and bandages
Held together by conformity and weak thread.
She looked at herself and instead of feeling whole
Instead of feeling fixed
She felt like a stranger
A lie
Finally knowing that all along
What was broken could not be fixed
By force of change
The only means to mend
To put herself together slowly
With the pieces that were already there
Not broken
Merely shifted
But it was too late
So she lay in pieces waiting
For the scars to fade
So she could try again