Rehabilitation

lets consider a heart taking a twelve steps program in getting rid of love addiction, first step is to confess the addiction and try to fight it

I’m writing but you’re holding the pen, I’m smiling but you’re shaping my face

I’m crying but you’re dropping the tears, I’m confused but you’re trembling my faith

How come that I’m walking down this vague road, where the only leader I have is you,

And you’re not there for me… you’re not actually here but what I’m seeing is you??!

I see you, the ups and the downs; you’re captivating my hand and pulling me behind

Unwillingly I follow you, but my heart is deeply wishing to never let go of your hand

I never know where you’re gonna stop, maybe you’ll put me on the highest shiny top

Or maybe you’ll abandon me on the nearest down and let me deal with the drop

I wake up in the morning feeling like a stranger in my own life … but I take the lead role

The play starts while I’m standing with dazzle eyes, wondering, waiting for you to call

Then I turn into two characters, one that loves having you around, to light my life

And the other one, wishes to set herself free, kick you out and dependently survive

I have to stop being in high spirits, do you how it feel like to wish for unhappiness??

To smile and wonder whether the next hour might be a flood of complete wretchedness??

I’m looking at my current life story, and putting my head in my hands, waitin’…

For you to do the action that could formulate my day similar to a day in heaven

Or frightened that you might walk away from me and turn my day into a nightmare

What kind of life I have, when my daily breath depends on the question of” is he there?”

With every second acting against what I’m feeling inside, like hiding a twister

I paint a smile and I don't know if it’s real, I hardly recognize my face in the mirror

How can my knight be my enemy… how could you simply turn your back on me?

How do you close your eyes at night while you know you’ve been unfair to me?

How do you steal away my dreams and make yourself the resident in my mind?

How do you make me see the world through your sight and still find myself blind?

Its time for me to write the end of my own story, I won’t wait till you let the curtain fall

I’m releasing myself from your prison, and I’m accepting the threat of losing it all

I don't want your fake happiness anymore; I want to see the end the road I’m taking

I’m not concerned about what it takes or how long it takes; eventually I’ll end up winning

I’ll gather my inner power, the power of a soul that you’ve been consuming all along

And I’ll get rid of your addiction, I‘ll feel absolutely nothing when I’ll hear our song