Paranoid but still i love

this sick paranoia infects me with fear.

my mind whispers all sorts of thoughts into my ear.

everry lil thing causes alarm bells to ring.

she is playing with you, there is someone else she is hiding.

maybe there is another and she is mix and matching.

in my head thoughts  are busy hatching.

i aint good enough, how do i know there isnt another.

a so called old friend, best friend, anything happing, kept undercover.

the only way i’ll know is if she makes a mistake, an undeleted text, some sort of indication and my heart shall surely break.

What happens every time i leave………….is oblivious to me…

i hope she will be honest and confess, cause lying is the one trait i dislike best.

I’d rather know then be kept in the dark to find out there here after.

So i can take action, with my map, belongings and charter.

With me by my side, and you behind me put aside. it gives me time to wipe away the tears i have cried.

but i know eventually my heart wil overwrite my pain,  and make me pull you into my arms again.

having your heart broken is terrible….horrid.

but to have it broken twice is dumb…..stupid.

heart ache is the new headache, stressing through my soul. now your gone when i die there will be no story to be told.

Incomplete if you left, i’ll never again be write. all these poems gone to waste, another i shall not right.