Chapter 20: The war of the princes

 

 

Suffering in his flesh

 

During this regrettable period, Schiller would constantly suffer from acute stomachaches and constipation as well as intermittent headaches which he would keep for the rest of his life. From dawn to dusk, he would be subject to the most incredible pains that would leave him crippled, exhausted on his bed for several days.

 

Having pursued all his science on his patient, his doctor would then recommend him to have a thermal treatment, in order to hasten the reemergence of the natural defenses of his otherwise strong body constitution. With the advice of Lotte, they would together choose the renown thermal town of Karlsbad. Accompanied with a medical assistant and his sister-in-law Karoline Beulwitz, they would together travel to this city, actually quite unsure of the benefits such treatment would have on the health of Schiller.

 

During the trip, however, Schiller would appear calm and if it were not for his countenance, he would maintain the most dignified composure. Lotte, however, knew very well how much he suffered in his most inner organs, in his flesh. Now, both Lotte would know the torture of having someone seriously sick and not knowing how to appease his sufferings. Schiller would now envisage the future with all his dark memories born from his difficult childhood and carried along his no lesser chaotic adult life.

 

The period of happiness which he has known the past few months seemed to him, in his momentary delirium, as a dream and constantly prey to some insidious and crippling pains, he would then think about Lotte's future should death separate them.

 

-        “Lotte! What should happen to you if I should die? Who will take care of you?”, would he then ask her, slowly, with great effort, his eyes starring fixedly on her eyes.

-        “Silliness! Of course you will not die! Now, will you please remain silent!? We still have long hours before reaching Karlsbad.” would she answer, covering his bleak face with her kisses. “Please remain still, my dear! You must not have such silly ideas!”.

 

A timid smile would then frown the face of Schiller. In his suffering, he thought that he still has the chance of having such a loving and patient wife by his side. All of a sudden, he did not feel any more the terrible weight of his former lonely years and the corresponding mental torments.

 

He closed his eyes and let the monotonous sounds of the horses and carriage on the dry road to Karlsbad lull him. The felicity of the last months has been most beneficial to him. For a couple of months, he has known the perfect happiness with his wife, together in Jena. Now that he was thinking of it, it was too much and this experience of total bliss with his wife must be taking its toll, as his mind and body have never been used to live in such a state of complete surrender.

 

-        “To such an extreme pleasure must correspond an extreme pain”, was he then thinking to himself, trying to rationalize what was happening to him.

 

But at the same time, he could not take from his mind the idea that all his symptoms correspond to that of a poisoning.