It's Not My Home

The poet laments on the shameful state the entire mankind has reached.

Utter an utmost shriek my heart

So loud for the deaf world to hear

So it may ponder over the broken love

Carrying pain too hard to bear.

Tattered and shattered this world stands,

The love for mankind is a far cry.

O Clarion! Reverberate your rebellious roar,

That may insist any man to try.

Why this insipid world enjoys the profound sleep,

when some rascals ravish her chastity?

Why this withered world do not shed tears,

when some scoundrels debauch the humanity?

Why this unmoved world still lays in the stupor,

when some knaves knit masses in their cruelty?

Man talks of justice and peace

And flogs his wife with barbarity!

Is this savage civilization of the Earth

should be termed as the 'Reverend Humanity'?

Full of horror, full of terror,

Full of disgraceful bestiality.

If this world is filled with all these,

Sorry, It's not my home, dear humanity!

*****

There's an immense need for a concealed revelation,

That should preach this dreary world,

The very lesson of devotion to women interests

And then the flag of serenity will be unfurled.

*****

Author's Note

Please share your views on this severe conundrum!

Reviews

[Sami Khalil]

A powerful message that needs to be heeded. We need to tell the politicians not to divide us and rule putting special interests in the place of humanity. Power grabbing, corporate greed and multi agendas are clashing all over. Thank you for sharing.

[Raj Sahu]

Thanks a lot!

[Coyote Poetry]

It is a scary world my friend.
"Full of horror, full of terror,
full of disgraceful bestiality.
If this world is filled with all these,
Sorry, It's not my home, dear humanity!"
Rare voices for peace. Need leaders that lead with concern, kindness and they listen. Powerful and worthwhile words shared .
Coyote

[Raj Sahu]

Thanks a lot dear!

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome my friend.

[Final-Karma]

This is a powerful message that I have shared as well. We are not utensils to be used for the profit of those that are, hypothetically, above us. We are all the same, within and without, let us share these views and push for a better tomorrow.

[Raj Sahu]

Thank you very much!

[‘Thoughts In Time..]

So very true and I wish more peoples eyes and ears would be opened to the truth- fleshly lusts are the downfall of mankind- I don’t belong here I’m also just passing through- learning lessons along the way- what a horrid place this humanity has become in more than one area of life - sad but true- ever so concerning- people need to examine their hearts - well written🌹

[Raj Sahu]

Thanks a lot!

[‘Thoughts In Time’🌹]

Pleasure🌹

[Linda Marie Van Tassell]

This is a message that resonates with the chords of my heart. People are so divided within themselves that they want to point the fingers of blame at politicians and elected bureaucrats for dividing the people. No! This is more indicative of the never-ending spiraling soullessness of the people. Until the people regain their heart and humanity, nothing will change. Politics are but a symptom. We (the people) are the disease.

[Raj Sahu]

Very true! Thank you for your amazing words.

[Ms Paragon]

Powerful message!I wish the deaf world could hear!Beautifully written.Well done!

[Raj Sahu]

Thank you!

[sette]

an eye opener definitely creatively written, a voice wanting to be heard,

[Raj Sahu]

Thank you!

[sette]

you are welcome

[JayG]

Seems a bit over the top. We open with someone unknown shrieking because it appears they broke up with their lover, and feeling pain too great to bear. May not be what you intent, but as presented, that is the meaning taken. And my first reaction was that this was what's called a "dismal damsel poem of the kind written by those experiencing the failure of a first love. Again, not your intent, but it is the impression the words give. And since a second first impression is impossible...

But then, in S2, we learn first that the WORLD is "tattered and shattered," still with S1's lost love mindset. So it's confusing. And then S2L2 says "The love for mankind is a far cry." What's a far cry? Usually those words include a subject, and mean "very different from." But in this case "a far cry" is treated as a noun. And you follow that with, "O Clarion! Reverberate your rebellious roar," But a clarion is a trumpet, which cannot roar rebeliously . And while a trumpet sound can reverberate, it can not, in and of itself, reverberate anything.

So in all, you're piling superlative on superlative, in an attempt to sound profound, but losing sight of the meaning of the words from-the-reader's-prospective, so the message can be lost in the wash of purple prose.

Remember, your intent for the piece never makes it to the page. The reader has only what the words suggest to them, based in their interpretation. So while it makes perfect sense to you, a reader may get lost in those blaring trumpets and not hear the message with the clarity you do.

Never forget that the thesaurus was not created to give you literary sounding alternatives for common words. Its goal was to allow you to choose the perfect word for the thought being expressed.

[Raj Sahu]

It's well that it went above your head!

[JayG]

Yeah, those grapes were sour, anyway, weren't they.

One tiny problem...Your JOB is to make the reader understand the meaning. So blaming them for your lack of clarity, rather than trying to improve your work seems a bit counterproductive.

[emipoemi]

Apart from a number of grammatical errors, this is absolutely stunning! Strong message, good flow, simply wonderful! Well done!

[Raj Sahu]

Thank you!

[emipoemi]

my pleasure.

[Anjali]

You wrote truth in this piece... It holds so much meaning.. I loved it.. it's beautiful!

[Raj Sahu]

Thank you so much!

[Anjali]

you're welcome!