Ragdoll

 

Yellows and oranges

like a wall upon canyon ridge

pillaring  smoke high

into the night sky

 

the Inferno of heat

rush towards the house

the sweet ragdoll left behind

now black ash upon the earth

 

 water

drops from eyes

of a child

her beloved now gone

 

a sadness lingers

for the fire took all

 

her hand in her mother's

as they enter a second hand store

she screamed

as she pointed to the likeness upon the wall

 

Mommy

Mommy

it's rag doll

Reviews

[Laura Maidah]

A ridge", not "the". You use "the" if you previously specified a location it's in. See how "the sky" is clearly "the" because we all know its location? And "the house" is clearly "the" because you already mention location with "the ridge". "The water" has extra verbosity. Nix "the". Just: "Water/ drops from eyes/...". "Into" is strange, syntax-wise. Hope this helps.