Josie Marie

On October 31st, 1903,

St. Hallow’s Graveyard was the worst place to be.

Unfortunately for young Josie, as fate would decide,

That was the place where her bones would reside.

Josie Marie was her full first name, 

and she was as curious as little girls came.

She loved to explore, to be brave and bold, 

and had beautiful blonde hair, like ringlets of gold.

That day she was wearing her favourite, white dress.

It was covered in pink posies stitched with finesse.

Skipping through the park on her daily adventure,

She stumbled on a graveyard that dared her to enter.

A fog swirled in and covered the ground 

while eerie groans echoed from trees all around.

It was then that Josie first heard their song,

Faint at first, but it quickly grew strong.

Curiousity took hold, common sense overrun

For remember, Josie was an inquisitive one.

She sprang into action and followed the sound, 

of course not noticing the fog on the ground.

Faster and faster she ran on ahead,

when she should have been watching the ground instead.

They taunted again with that singsong rhyme,

hiding in shadows and biding their time.

Just one glimpse was all she needed, 

then she’d go straight home like her parents had pleaded.

If she could only catch up and have a quick peek

she’d be a good little girl the rest of the week!

But all at once the ground disappeared

and down she plunged, while her onlookers sneered.

With a sickening crack, her spine was snapped.

Although still alive, she was now trapped.

Lying at the bottom of a freshly dug grave,

Josie Marie no longer felt brave.

Out of the fog, they emerged all at once

just as they always did at the end of their hunts.

They joined hands round her grave and began to sing,

Skipping and dancing around in a ring.

“Ring-a-ring-a-roses,

A pocket full of posies;

Ashes! Ashes!

We all fall down.”

Josie never did see what she’d been chasing

and maybe it’s better to not know what she was facing.

Like a broken rag doll, lost and forgotten

Josie Marie was left to go rotten.

Author's Note

All feedback welcome. I hope you enjoyed....and maybe was a little scared. :p

Picture from: http://kickingcorners.blogspot.com/2012/01/300-words-or-less-ring-around-rosie.html

Reviews

[Wolfwind]

I loved it! The tale itself serves as a good reminder to all little one's not to run off in the fog or something bad may happen. Certainly a tale I'd tell a group of young children around Halloween time.
There were a few stanzas that threw off the flow, usually it was a line that could use an extra word or minus a word to even up the beat count. But overall I think you did a wonderful job here.

Great ink!
Aaron

[Owlgirl]

Wow! Oh wow! That is... Amazing! The horrific chill down your spine and suspenseful tingling as you wait in antagonized patience for the outcome! I love it! You are so talented!!!

[Kyle]

This is chilling! And very well done. I think the picture should be changed. This write is powerful, sad, and skillfully done. But the pic could add an intensity to this by choosing one with real smiling kids who are chasing around each other in a circle...dont you think?

[Jay. E. V.]

Oh...My...God. You have a sickeningly talented way about horror. If I didn't know better I would think I was reading Poe himself. I found no errors, the lines flowed perfectly. You painted an image with so few words and I am thoroughly impressed. When her spine snapped, you crossed a moral line, shocking the reader into noticing, and NEVER forgetting=). It was excellent. I got chills. You are the one who should write more. These horror poems belong in a collection and should be sold. Parents will frighten their children around the campfire for years to come=)