102. 6 was spent
paralyzed. Breathing through a ventilator. Now finally, yes, after wallowing
around taking up space better taken by others, finally, I see the light. The
bright, lovely, beautiful, omnipotent light. More than a sun or quasar. Winged
beings of hope and just surround me. The al mighty hand reaching forth. Yes. Oh
yes! I attempt to grasp the hand that belongs to the lord of eternity. But I
can’t. The open palm closes and leaves my sight. No! I am worthy, let me be
part of this new existence. The beings fade like breath on a window. The light.
The wonderful, it’s still there. But… manufactured. No! Don’t force me to stay.
I want to leave. To go to the beyond. To see my loved ones who left as well.
Please, goddammit please. Let me go.