we do not care, Can not care!

saw something today, totally left me psyched!

their merciless souls 

do not care 

their bodies 

do not care

their minds

dont give a s**t

for what happens to their lives

the lives of those

left in agony

with no one to care

no one to see

everyone cries 

for

no one cares 

no one can care

without being weak

that is their utmost weakness

i know

i have seen it

i have been there

i know it all

their weakness

our weakness

is 

not to show any weakness

too proud we are

we should 

show our sorrow

share it with the world

not hide it

and

restrict ourselves

from doing what we can

witholding their lives

we do not care

we do not care

for anything but us

we should

but we should

for the lives and sakes of other

we do not care

we can not care

without showing weakness

we can not do anything

but

 we have to

for a world

where we can live in peace 

without showing any weakness

we need 

to trust

share

our sorrow

our agony

our pain

our love

we need to share

for that is the right thing to do

which we have to do 

but we do not care

can not care!!

Reviews

[Rhianne Ney]

Whoa, a great spin in the title~!

[Muhammad Qasim]

thanks

[Rhianne Ney]

:D

[Muhammad Qasim]

thanks again!!

[Rhianne Ney]

Welcome~

[Muhammad Qasim]

:)

[Moniba]

................................................................................................................

[Muhammad Qasim]

.................................................................................................................

[Moniba]

Cheater. When I commented, I meant k i'm speechless.

[Muhammad Qasim]

when i commented i meant thank you for the review : )

[Moniba]

Cheater. Again .

[Muhammad Qasim]

say whatever u want :)

[oxo]

well, i like it. sometimes, i do not really care. so true that we need to share, even our own sorrows to others.

[David Scott]

I must say that I honestly did not like this. It just made me feel bad. Maybe that was your intent. I am not put off by a rant or dark poetry, but usually I feel something behind the work left unsaid or a point that is made to effect change. I may have misse the point here. Even the style and the thinking process felt all "out of joint" to me. Sorry to be less than enthusiastic. I'm glad your psyched to write and keep writing as others may love this work. I will always be honest with my reviews though. So you can believe the positive reviews I write...
BTW, I care enough to write an honest review and you care enough to write and post your poetry... We do care. We cannot help but to care. It is in our DNA. It is what separates us from animals. :-)
Be well.

[Muhammad Qasim]

you have a point which i will agree with but in Pakistan (my country) this is common and it is directly based upon us, i do not know how things are in your country but i am writing from what i see and this was the thing that i saw last and got me seriously sad and thus i decided to write on it! Atiba and Hamza liked it, if i say so or just a guess on my side because this is also somewhat common in their Country!
And i do not mind because this is a place to share and if we keep our thoughts to ourself then their is no point to this site and thanks for the honest review. Honesty is the best policy! : )

[The dark story]

the message in your sweet poem.that's what we humans need to adopt.and then we can be actually called Human.that's what humanity is made of....that love and care and solicitude are the purest element on earth........they are more precious than diamonds as they can help us gain anything.even captures the hearts of millions..really .this is a brilliant writing......just awesome!!111

[Muhammad Qasim]

Thank you for the wonderful review and we need to adopt to care, to help others not see them and laugh, Thank you for the review!

[The dark story]

yeah....you'r absolutely right....

[Muhammad Qasim]

i Know!! i am always right

[The dark story]

huh.you had the ball in your court but only for this time......not always

[Hamza]

t think i know what this is related with ..
everybody cares but nobody shows it ... and this is where we lag behind ..
going against a super power won't do good to anyone, but if everyone stands then only can we stop all this ..
very impressive poem ... put this up everywhere .. and let the world know that we all care ..

[Muhammad Qasim]

yes .. my point exactly, they take it disrespect to themselves to care for others!!

[dunnia]

This is sooo nice....dnt worry i care :p

[Muhammad Qasim]

Good to know that

[Abdur Raqeeb]

Nice poem. I just think there are 1 or 2 stanzas where you have repeated some words. Otherwise, It is good!

[Muhammad Qasim]

You mean the words .. we do not care .. can not care ?? ..

[Abdur Raqeeb]

Not that one. The 'we should' repeated twice sounds odd.

[Muhammad Qasim]

repeating it twice i made it a bit heavier .. dont u think ?? .. i think that is good for a poem .. wont u say ?

[Abdur Raqeeb]

Every one has different views. Maybe you viewed it from a perspective much different from mine. I honestly felt that it sounded strange. But as you say it made the poetry heavier, it's fine.

[Muhammad Qasim]

Okay : ) and thank you for reviewing

[Muhammad Ibraheem]

flow is quite good and description too :)
the heading and the feelings you described are really true :)

[Muhammad Qasim]

Thanks

[Muhammad Ibraheem]

:)

[RachelReaper]

this i found to be so true, oh, and I like the way you worded it simply, with some parallel structure, but also said what you needed to say. Also, i think those 2 exclamation marks at the end are kind of your trademark now.

[Muhammad Qasim]

Thank you and those exclamation mark might just be!!